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Anger

Almost nobody wants to be the person who says the thing they cannot take back. The window between the surge and the words is short and it can be widened. That is most of what this area is about, along with the fear or hurt that anger is usually protecting.

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Approach · Gottman

Core 50 Mindfulness 14 CBT 11 Body based 8 Medical and treatment 2 Trauma informed 2 Gottman 1

When · After a row

Under stress 4 Any ordinary day 1 After a row 1

If your break turned into disappearing for the night, look at it as fear rather than as a discipline problem. Anger is often a way out of feeling afraid, and so is running.

Shame teaches badly here. Telling yourself you failed at the skill tends to produce more heat, and heat is the thing you were trying to leave behind.…

Five minutesChoosing your responseGottmanQur’an 7:200