Inshirahone small thing, well groundedRight now

Areas › Anger

Anger

Almost nobody wants to be the person who says the thing they cannot take back. The window between the surge and the words is short and it can be widened. That is most of what this area is about, along with the fear or hurt that anger is usually protecting.

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2 practices
What you are actually defending remove filterFive minutes remove filterAfter a row remove filterClear all
Theme · What you are actually defending
What anger actually is 19Equanimity and perspective 13Choosing your response 7The fear underneath anger 7The moment before you snap 3Practising under provocation 3Growing empathy 2What you are actually defending 2Cool the body first 2Making it stick 1Righteous anger and perfectionism 1When anger turns to harm 1Anger, alcohol and the body 1
When · After a row
Any ordinary day 10After a row 2Under stress 1In a change 1Something good 1Coming and going 1

Demanding respect quietly puts you below the person you are demanding it from. You are asking for something only they can hand over, which makes you the one in need.

That is an odd position for a stance meant to prove you will not be pushed around. To anyone watching it usually reads as need rather than strength.…

Five minutesWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 28:83

Say what you would prefer and what you will do, not what they have to feel. I do not like being spoken to this way, and if it carries on I am going to step out of the conversation.

The difference is small and it changes everything. A demand needs their cooperation to succeed, so it can be refused, and being refused is where the…

Five minutesWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 42:41