Inshirahone small thing, well groundedRight now

Areas › Anger

Anger

Almost nobody wants to be the person who says the thing they cannot take back. The window between the surge and the words is short and it can be widened. That is most of what this area is about, along with the fear or hurt that anger is usually protecting.

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22 practices
What anger actually is remove filterAfter a row remove filterClear all
Theme · What anger actually is
What anger actually is 22Equanimity and perspective 14The fear underneath anger 12Cool the body first 9Choosing your response 7The moment before you snap 7Practising under provocation 6When anger turns to harm 3Making it stick 2What you are actually defending 2Growing empathy 2Anger, alcohol and the body 1Righteous anger and perfectionism 1
How long you have
A minute 1Five minutes 19Twenty minutes 2
When · After a row
Any ordinary day 58After a row 22Under stress 20In a change 2When apart 1

Anger feels righteous while it lasts. The useful moment comes later, when the regret shows up and the story has gone quiet.

Nobody changes course mid-shout, and pressing then only adds fuel. Hours or a day afterwards there is usually a stretch where a person is…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 21:87

Some anger arrives with an argument already inside it: that they disrespected you, that this is not how you are meant to be treated. It burns cooler than the sudden kind and it lasts much longer.

Because it is made of a story, it can be handled at the level of the story. What did that gesture actually mean. What would it mean if they were…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 5:8