Inshirahone small thing, well groundedRight now

Areas › Anger

Anger

Almost nobody wants to be the person who says the thing they cannot take back. The window between the surge and the words is short and it can be widened. That is most of what this area is about, along with the fear or hurt that anger is usually protecting.

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2 practices
Growing empathy remove filterAfter a row remove filterClear all
Theme · Growing empathy
What anger actually is 22Equanimity and perspective 14The fear underneath anger 12Cool the body first 9Choosing your response 7The moment before you snap 7Practising under provocation 6When anger turns to harm 3Growing empathy 2What you are actually defending 2Making it stick 2Righteous anger and perfectionism 1Anger, alcohol and the body 1
Approach
Body based 1Medical and treatment 1
When · After a row
Any ordinary day 29Under stress 4After a row 2When apart 1

Repeating back what your partner said proves you were listening. It does not prove you were touched by it, and they can tell the difference.

Reflective listening can be done perfectly and still land cold, because the words check the content while your face and body report that nothing…

Five minutesGrowing empathyBody basedQur’an 21:107

The thing worth admitting is not that you were angry. It is what you were frightened of underneath it: being made a fool of, being left, being counted as useless.

Anger is the easy half to say and it rarely lands well. The fear underneath is harder to say and it is the part that gets you heard. One sentence…

Five minutesGrowing empathyMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:24