Inshirahone small thing, well groundedRight now

Areas › Anger

Anger

Almost nobody wants to be the person who says the thing they cannot take back. The window between the surge and the words is short and it can be widened. That is most of what this area is about, along with the fear or hurt that anger is usually protecting.

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22 practices
The fear underneath anger remove filterA minute remove filterClear all
Theme · The fear underneath anger
The moment before you snap 39Choosing your response 36Cool the body first 34What anger actually is 26The fear underneath anger 22Equanimity and perspective 17Practising under provocation 14Growing empathy 14Making it stick 14What you are actually defending 6Righteous anger and perfectionism 2When anger turns to harm 2Anger, alcohol and the body 1
How long you have · A minute
A minute 22Five minutes 29Twenty minutes 6Longer 4
When
Under stress 13Any ordinary day 5After a row 4

Someone shouting at you is usually frightened of something, even when they look like the one in charge of the room.

It might be fear of being left, of being made a fool of, of losing something they cannot afford to lose. You will not always find out which, and you…

A minuteThe fear underneath angerCoreQur’an 20:67

Never decide you are safe because the other person is scared. Frightened people are often the ones who go furthest.

Anger as fear is a useful way of understanding somebody and a useless safety assessment. If the voice is rising, if the space between you is closing,…

A minuteThe fear underneath angerCoreQur’an 20:45