Inshirahone small thing, well groundedRight now

Areas › Anger

Anger

Almost nobody wants to be the person who says the thing they cannot take back. The window between the surge and the words is short and it can be widened. That is most of what this area is about, along with the fear or hurt that anger is usually protecting.

Narrowed down

3 practices
Making it stick remove filterTwenty minutes remove filterClear all
Theme · Making it stick
What anger actually is 10The moment before you snap 8Cool the body first 6The fear underneath anger 6Growing empathy 4Righteous anger and perfectionism 4Choosing your response 4When anger turns to harm 4Equanimity and perspective 3Anger, alcohol and the body 3Practising under provocation 3Making it stick 3What you are actually defending 1
How long you have · Twenty minutes
A minute 14Five minutes 12Twenty minutes 3Longer 4
Approach
Core 2Mindfulness 1
When
Any ordinary day 2Under stress 1

Knowing something calmly and feeling it are two separate achievements, and the second takes longer. If you can say the reasonable thing but it does not touch how you feel, you are partway, not failing.

The gap does not close by arguing with yourself harder. It closes by living it: doing the practice in real situations, in your body, while the…

Twenty minutesMaking it stickCoreQur’an 87:8

Pick the news channel you cannot stand and watch ten minutes of it on purpose. The only job is to notice what rises in you and let it go by.

Real provocation turns up when you are least ready for it. This gives you the feeling with nothing at stake: the indignation, the tightening, the…

Twenty minutesMaking it stickMindfulnessQur’an 41:35

When something is genuinely alive for the person in front of you, work with that. Whatever you had planned to cover keeps until a quieter week.

Teaching over the top of live feeling does not land, and it tells the other person that your agenda outranks their week. When there is heat, follow…

Twenty minutesMaking it stickCoreQur’an 18:23