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Worry and anxiety
Anxiety is not a character flaw and it is not weak faith. It is a body doing what it was built to do, at a moment when it is not needed. The practices here work on the loop itself: what worry promises and never delivers, what avoiding costs you, and how to let the body come down.
Narrowed down
4 practicesHow long you have · Five minutes
When · Coming and going
Find one adult in the building the child already trusts, and have them meet the child at the entrance. The doorway is the hardest minute of the day.
The job is small and specific: be there at the door, walk with them to their locker, get them started, be findable later on. It turns the worst…
Let the person facing it choose the first step, and let them choose an easy one. A rung somebody picked gets climbed. A rung assigned to them gets argued about.
Ask which one they would be willing to have a go at this week, not which one they ought to be able to manage. The answer usually sits somewhere in…
No step happens without the person agreeing to it. Not ordered, not dragged, not talked round in a bright voice. Agreement is a condition of the thing working, not a courtesy.
Coerced exposure teaches two lessons at once: that the situation is dangerous, and that you are not safe with the people who arranged it. After that…
Before you go towards the thing you are afraid of, it helps to have two things to hand: a way to settle your body, and a fairer account of what is likely to happen.
Neither of them is meant to take the fear away. They are there so you can stay in the situation long enough for it to teach you something, and that…