What actually happens in the appointment

Nobody takes a baby away because a mother says she is struggling. That fear stops more women getting help than anything else in this course, so it is worth being direct about it. Services are built to keep mothers and babies together, and asking for help is evidence that you are looking after your baby rather than evidence against you.

What happens is a conversation. Someone asks how long this has been going on, what you have stopped doing, how you are sleeping in the gaps, and whether you have had thoughts of harming yourself or the baby. They ask that last one of everybody. It is a routine question and a plain yes is easier for them to work with than a hesitation.

Two questions are used across services as an opening. Over the past month, have you often been bothered by feeling down, depressed or hopeless. And over the past month, have you often been bothered by having little interest or pleasure in doing things. They are a way in to a conversation and not a test.

You may also be offered a short questionnaire. It is not a verdict, it is a prompt for the conversation, and whoever gives it to you interprets it with you. This course does not run one. Nothing here scores you and nothing here can tell you what you have.

Take someone with you if you can. Write your three sentences down beforehand, because the appointment is short and you will not remember them.