Why the numbers you have read disagree with each other
You may have seen it claimed that men and women do this to each other at about the same rate. There is a reason that claim exists and a reason it is misleading, and it is worth knowing, because somebody will say it to you.
What the research says
Myhill A (2015). Measuring coercive control: what can we learn from national population surveys?. Violence Against Women, 21(3), 355 to 375
Surveys that count separate incidents, such as how many times each person pushed the other, produce roughly equal rates for men and women. Surveys that ask about control, fear and restriction do not, and show a strongly uneven picture. The instrument decides the answer, so any figure quoted at you is worth checking for what it actually measured. We have left the identifier off this line because we could not confirm it.