Marital quality and satisfaction جودة الزواج

يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ لَا يَحِلُّ لَكُمۡ أَن تَرِثُواْ ٱلنِّسَآءَ كَرۡهࣰ اۖ وَلَا تَعۡضُلُوهُنَّ لِتَذۡهَبُواْ بِبَعۡضِ مَآ ءَاتَيۡتُمُوهُنَّ إِلَّآ أَن يَأۡتِينَ بِفَٰحِشَةࣲ مُّبَيِّنَةࣲۚ وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِٱلۡمَعۡرُوفِۚ فَإِن كَرِهۡتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَىٰٓ أَن تَكۡرَهُواْ شَيۡـࣰٔ ا وَيَجۡعَلَ ٱللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيۡرࣰ ا كَثِيرࣰ ا

You who believe, it is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will, nor should you treat your wives harshly, hoping to take back some of the bride-gift you gave them, unless they are guilty of something clearly outrageous. Live with them in accordance with what is fair and kind: if you dislike them, it may well be that you dislike something in which God has put much good

وَمِنۡ ءَايَٰتِهِۦٓ أَنۡ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنۡ أَنفُسِكُمۡ أَزۡوَٰجࣰ ا لِّتَسۡكُنُوٓاْ إِلَيۡهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيۡنَكُم مَّوَدَّةࣰ وَرَحۡمَةًۚ إِنَّ فِي ذَٰلِكَ لَأٓيَٰتࣲ لِّقَوۡمࣲ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ

Another of His signs is that He created spouses from among yourselves for you to live with in tranquillity: He ordained love and kindness between you. There truly are signs in this for those who reflect

وَلَئِنۡ أَصَٰبَكُمۡ فَضۡلࣱ مِّنَ ٱللَّهِ لَيَقُولَنَّ كَأَن لَّمۡ تَكُنۢ بَيۡنَكُمۡ وَبَيۡنَهُۥ مَوَدَّةࣱ يَٰلَيۡتَنِي كُنتُ مَعَهُمۡ فَأَفُوزَ فَوۡزًا عَظِيمࣰ ا

yet he is sure to say, if you are favoured by God, ‘If only I had been with them, I could have made great gains,’ as if there had been no ties of affection between you and him

ذَٰلِكَ ٱلَّذِي يُبَشِّرُ ٱللَّهُ عِبَادَهُ ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ وَعَمِلُواْ ٱلصَّٰلِحَٰتِۗ قُل لَّآ أَسۡـَٔلُكُمۡ عَلَيۡهِ أَجۡرًا إِلَّا ٱلۡمَوَدَّةَ فِي ٱلۡقُرۡبَىٰۗ وَمَن يَقۡتَرِفۡ حَسَنَةࣰ نَّزِدۡ لَهُۥ فِيهَا حُسۡنًاۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ غَفُورࣱ شَكُورٌ

it is of this that God gives good news to His servants who believe and do good deeds. Say [Prophet], ‘I ask no reward from you for this, only the affection due to kin.’ If anyone does good, We shall increase it for him; God is most forgiving and most appreciative

۞لَتَجِدَنَّ أَشَدَّ ٱلنَّاسِ عَدَٰوَةࣰ لِّلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ ٱلۡيَهُودَ وَٱلَّذِينَ أَشۡرَكُواْۖ وَلَتَجِدَنَّ أَقۡرَبَهُم مَّوَدَّةࣰ لِّلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ ٱلَّذِينَ قَالُوٓاْ إِنَّا نَصَٰرَىٰۚ ذَٰلِكَ بِأَنَّ مِنۡهُمۡ قِسِّيسِينَ وَرُهۡبَانࣰ ا وَأَنَّهُمۡ لَا يَسۡتَكۡبِرُونَ

You [Prophet] are sure to find that the most hostile to the believers are the Jews and those who associate other deities with God; you are sure to find that the closest in affection towards the believers are those who say, ‘We are Christians,’ for there are among them people devoted to learning and ascetics. These people are not given to arrogance

۞عَسَى ٱللَّهُ أَن يَجۡعَلَ بَيۡنَكُمۡ وَبَيۡنَ ٱلَّذِينَ عَادَيۡتُم مِّنۡهُم مَّوَدَّةࣰۚ وَٱللَّهُ قَدِيرࣱۚ وَٱللَّهُ غَفُورࣱ رَّحِيمࣱ‏

God may still bring about affection between you and your present enemies- God is all powerful, God is most forgiving and merciful

O you who have faith, it is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will, neither debar them from marriage that you may go off with part of what you have given them, unless they commit a flagrant indecency. Consort with them honorably. For, if you are averse to them, it may be that you are averse to something within which God has placed much good. This is a call, an admonishment, an allusion, a bearing witness, and a ruling. O is the call, you is the admonishment, who is the allusion, have faith is the bearing witness. It is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will is the ruling. The explanation of the ruling is that women are considered weak, and they are imprisoned beneath your severity. Beware of tormenting them, and do not rule over them by way of scheming and deceit. Do not be severe, and do not ask of them what the Shariah does not approve. On the contrary,

O you who believe it is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will read either karhan or kurhan as alternative forms that is to say coercing them into this. In pre-Islamic times they used to inherit women from their kin and if they so wished they could marry a woman without a dowry or marry her off and take the dowry for themselves or prevent her from marriage until she gave up what she had inherited or until she died and they could inherit from her. They were thus forbidden such practices; neither debar them your former wives from marrying others by retaining them while you have no desire for them yourselves only to harm them; so that you may go off with part of what you have given them of the dowry except when they commit flagrant read mubayyina ‘making it clear’ or mubayyana ‘clear’ lewdness such as adultery or rebellion then you have the right to coerce them until they re

And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates — Eve was created from Adam’s rib and the remainder of mankind from the reproductive fluids of men and women — that you might find peace by their side and become intimate with them and He ordained between you all affection and mercy. Surely in that mentioned there are signs for a people who reflect upon God’s handiwork exalted be He.

And among His signs is this that He created you from dust, and then – behold you are human beings scattered (20)And among His signs is this that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect (21) Among the Signs of Allah Allah says: وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ (And among His signs) – which speak of His might and power, is the fact that He created your father Adam out of dust. ثُمَّ إِذَا أَنْتُمْ بَشَرٌ تَنْتَشِرُونَ (and then – behold you are human beings scattered!) So man's origins lie in dust, then in a despised liquid, then he is formed and becomes a clot, then a lump of flesh, then bones in the form of a human being. Then Allah clothes the bones with flesh. Then the soul is breathed into him and he can hear and see. Then he comes forth from his mot

(Say (O Muhammad, unto mankind): I ask of you no fee therefor, save loving kindness among kinsfolk�) [42:23]. Said Ibn �Abbas: �When the Messenger of Allah, Allah bless him and give him peace, migrated to Medina, he went through periods of time when he faced needs and rights which he had to address but did not have the means to do so. The Helpers said: �Allah, exalted is He, has guided you through this man who is the son of your sister. He faces life�s vicissitudes and has rights but does not have the means to fulfil them. Collect for him from your wealth that which will not hurt you and give it to him so that he uses it to help himself with the ups and downs of life�. They collected some wealth and took it to him. They said: �O Messenger of Allah, you are the son of our sister, and Allah, exalted is He, has guided us through you. Sometimes you go through ups and downs in life and you al

(Thou wilt find the most vehement of mankind in hostility to those who believe (to be) the Jews) up to His words (But those who disbelieve and deny Our revelations, they are owners of hell-fire) [5:82-86]. These verses were revealed about the Negus and his followers. Said Ibn �Abbas: �When he was in Mecca, the Messenger of Allah, Allah bless him and give him peace, used to fear the idolaters� persecution of his Companions. He therefore sent Ja�far ibn Abi Talib and �Abd Allah ibn Mas�ud, at the head of a group of his Companions, to the Negus. He said: �The Negus is a righteous man; he is not an oppressor and none is oppressed in his dominion. So head toward him and remain there until Allah creates relief for the Muslims�. When they went to him, the Negus honoured them and then asked them: �Do you memorise anything of that which was revealed to you?� They answered in the affirmative and t

حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو كُرَيْبٍ، مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ الْعَلاَءِ حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدَةُ بْنُ سُلَيْمَانَ، عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو سَلَمَةَ، عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏ "‏ أَكْمَلُ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ إِيمَانًا أَحْسَنُهُمْ خُلُقًا وَخِيَارُكُمْ خِيَارُكُمْ لِنِسَائِهِمْ خُلُقًا ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَ وَفِي الْبَابِ عَنْ عَائِشَةَ وَابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى حَدِيثُ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ صَحِيحٌ ‏.‏

Abu Hurairah narrated that The Messenger of Allah said:“The most complete of the believers in faith, is the one with the best character among them. And the best of you are those who are best to your women.”

حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ يَحْيَى، قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ يُوسُفَ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا سُفْيَانُ، عَنْ هِشَامِ بْنِ عُرْوَةَ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، عَنْ عَائِشَةَ، قَالَتْ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏ "‏ خَيْرُكُمْ خَيْرُكُمْ لأَهْلِهِ وَأَنَا خَيْرُكُمْ لأَهْلِي وَإِذَا مَاتَ صَاحِبُكُمْ فَدَعُوهُ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ غَرِيبٌ صَحِيحٌ مِنْ حَدِيثِ الثَّوْرِيِّ مَا أَقَلَّ مَنْ رَوَاهُ عَنِ الثَّوْرِيِّ ‏.‏ وَرُوِيَ هَذَا عَنْ هِشَامِ بْنِ عُرْوَةَ عَنْ أَبِيهِ عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم مُرْسَلٌ ‏.‏

Narrated 'Aishah:that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: "The best of you is the best to his wives, and I am the best of you to my wives, and when your companion dies, leave him alone

حَدَّثَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ مُحَمَّدٍ، حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ اللَّهِ بْنُ الْمُبَارَكِ، عَنْ حَيْوَةَ بْنِ شُرَيْحٍ، عَنْ شُرَحْبِيلَ بْنِ شَرِيكٍ، عَنْ أَبِي عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ الْحُبُلِيِّ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو، قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏ "‏ خَيْرُ الأَصْحَابِ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ خَيْرُهُمْ لِصَاحِبِهِ وَخَيْرُ الْجِيرَانِ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ خَيْرُهُمْ لِجَارِهِ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ غَرِيبٌ ‏.‏ وَأَبُو عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ الْحُبُلِيُّ اسْمُهُ عَبْدُ اللَّهِ بْنُ يَزِيدَ ‏.‏

Abdullah bin Amr narrated that the Messenger of Allah said :"The companion who is the best to Allah is the one who is best to his companion. And the neighbor that is the best to Allah is the one that is best to his neighbor

حَدَّثَنَا قُتَيْبَةُ، حَدَّثَنَا جَعْفَرُ بْنُ سُلَيْمَانَ الضُّبَعِيُّ، عَنْ ثَابِتٍ، عَنْ أَنَسٍ، قَالَ خَدَمْتُ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم عَشْرَ سِنِينَ فَمَا قَالَ لِي أُفٍّ قَطُّ وَمَا قَالَ لِشَيْءٍ صَنَعْتُهُ لِمَ صَنَعْتَهُ وَلاَ لِشَيْءٍ تَرَكْتُهُ لِمَ تَرَكْتَهُ وَكَانَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم مِنْ أَحْسَنِ النَّاسِ خُلُقًا وَلاَ مَسِسْتُ خَزًّا قَطُّ وَلاَ حَرِيرًا وَلاَ شَيْئًا كَانَ أَلْيَنَ مِنْ كَفِّ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم وَلاَ شَمَمْتُ مِسْكًا قَطُّ وَلاَ عِطْرًا كَانَ أَطْيَبَ مِنْ عَرَقِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى وَفِي الْبَابِ عَنْ عَائِشَةَ وَالْبَرَاءِ ‏.‏ وَهَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ صَحِيحٌ ‏.‏

Anas narrated:that "I served the Prophet for ten years. He never said Uff and never blamed me by saying: 'Why did you do so' or why did you not do so?' And the Messenger Of Allah had the best character among all of the people. I never touched Khazz nor silk, nor anything softer than the hand of the Messenger of Allah, nor have I smelled musk, or a fragrance sweeter than the sweat of the Messenger of Allah

حَدَّثَنَا عَلِيُّ بْنُ عَيَّاشٍ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو غَسَّانَ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنِي مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ الْمُنْكَدِرِ، عَنْ جَابِرِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏ "‏ كُلُّ مَعْرُوفٍ صَدَقَةٌ ‏"‏‏.‏

Narrated Jabir bin `Abdullah:The Prophet (ﷺ) said, Enjoining, all that is good is a Sadaqa

حَدَّثَنَا عَلِيُّ بْنُ الْحَكَمِ الأَنْصَارِيُّ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو عَوَانَةَ، عَنْ رَقَبَةَ، عَنْ طَلْحَةَ الْيَامِيِّ، عَنْ سَعِيدِ بْنِ جُبَيْرٍ، قَالَ قَالَ لِي ابْنُ عَبَّاسٍ هَلْ تَزَوَّجْتَ قُلْتُ لاَ‏.‏ قَالَ فَتَزَوَّجْ فَإِنَّ خَيْرَ هَذِهِ الأُمَّةِ أَكْثَرُهَا نِسَاءً‏.‏

Narrated Sa`id bin Jubair:Ibn `Abbas asked me, "Are you married?" I replied, "No." He said, "Marry, for the best person of this (Muslim) nation (i.e., Muhammad) of all other Muslims, had the largest number of wives

معينة على ما شرع الله سبحانه له من النكاح وملك اليمين من إعفاف الرجل نفسه وأهله فلا تطمح نفسه إلى سواها من الحرام ويعفها فلا تطمح نفسها إلى غيره وكلما كانت المحبة بين الزوجين أتم وأقوى كان هذا المقصود أتم وأكمل قال تعالى : @QB@ هو الذي خلقكم من @QE@ @QB@ نفس واحدة وجعل منها زوجها ليسكن إليها @QE@ وقال : @QB@ ومن آياته أن خلق لكم من أنفسكم أزواجا لتسكنوا إليها وجعل بينكم مودة ورحمة @QE@

| الباب الثالث في آداب المعاشرة وما يجري في دوام النكاح

قال رجل للحسن: ممن أزوج ابنتي؟ قال: ممن يتقى الله، فإنه إن أحبها أكرمها، وإن أبغضها لن يظلمها. ### | 3 فصل في آداب المعاشرة والنظر فيما على الزوج وفيما على الزوجة

القسم الثاني: من آداب المعاشرة، ما على الزوجة لزوجها.

وقالت طائفة يجب عليه وطؤها في العمر مرة واحدة ليستقر لها بذلك الصداق وهذا من جنس القول الأول وهذا باطل من وجه آخر فإن المقصود إنما هو المعاشرة بالمعروف والصداق دخل في العقد تعظيما لحرمته وفرقا بينه وبين السفاح فوجوب المقصود بالنكاح أقوى من وجوب الصداق

أن يلقى أمر الزوج إلى سمع الزوجة وإن كانت بكرا فذلك أحرى وأولى بالألفة ولذلك يستحب النظر إليها قبل النكاح فإنه أحرى أن يؤدم بينهما

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