Areas › Your body › Your nervous system
Calm can feel unsafe if you have not had much of it. Take it in small amounts and let it be strange at first.
Grounding exercises sometimes leave people more agitated rather than less, and then they decide they are doing it wrong. Often the truth is that stillness leaves nothing to be busy with. Try thirty seconds rather than ten minutes, keep your eyes open, and stop while it is still comfortable instead of pushing on to prove something.
Qur’an and Sunnah
'It was He who made His tranquillity descend into the hearts of the believers' (Quran 48:4). Calm is spoken of as something sent, which takes some of the pressure off having to manufacture it on demand.
هُوَ ٱلَّذِيٓ أَنزَلَ ٱلسَّكِينَةَ فِي قُلُوبِ ٱلۡمُؤۡمِنِينَ لِيَزۡدَادُوٓاْ إِيمَٰنࣰ ا مَّعَ إِيمَٰنِهِمۡۗ وَلِلَّهِ جُنُودُ ٱلسَّمَٰوَٰتِ وَٱلۡأَرۡضِۚ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ عَلِيمًا حَكِيمࣰ ا
It was He who made His tranquillity descend into the hearts of the believers, to add faith to their faith––the forces of the heavens and earth belong to God; He is all knowing and all wise––
Qur’an 48:4read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
What the research says
A randomised controlled trial of 126 people compared physical activity, mindfulness meditation and breathing biofeedback for stress, and all three reduced stress, anxiety, depression and sleep problems to a comparable degree, with no clear winner. There is no single required route to a calmer state. If sitting still is the route that spikes you, walking is not a lesser option.
van der Zwan JE, de Vente W, Huizink AC, Bögels SM, de Bruin EI. (2015). Physical activity, mindfulness meditation, or heart rate variability biofeedback for stress reduction: a randomized controlled trial.. Applied psychophysiology and biofeedback doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
Why it works
Anything unfamiliar reads as risky at first, including feeling settled, so it has to be met in amounts your body can absorb.
This one is still a draft. It is waiting on a scholar and a clinician to read it before it is published.
Near this one
Coming up out of numbness usually feels worse before it feels better. Restlessness, irritation and a jumpy stomach are often the way up rather than a relapse.
Relaxation exercises make some people feel worse, and there is a reason for it. The branch that gives you rest when you are safe is the branch that gives you shutdown when you are not.
When you are far from settled, aim for the next step rather than for calm. Rattled is a real improvement on numb.