Areas › Your body › Your nervous system
If a practice feels like homework you are failing at, turn it into a game. Some feedback tools do this for you, bringing colour and birdsong to a grey screen as your heart rhythm settles.
Trying hard to relax is a trap. The effort keeps you keyed up, and then you have one more thing to be bad at. Play sidesteps that entirely. It is the obvious route with children and teenagers, and it suits plenty of adults too, particularly anyone who has never managed to sit still for a meditation. Anything absorbing that gives you immediate feedback and does not care how hard you are trying will do the job.
Qur’an and Sunnah
'It is God who brought you out of your mothers' wombs knowing nothing' (Quran 16:78). Everyone is learning from scratch, and learning goes better when it is not grim.
وَٱللَّهُ أَخۡرَجَكُم مِّنۢ بُطُونِ أُمَّهَٰتِكُمۡ لَا تَعۡلَمُونَ شَيۡـࣰٔ ا وَجَعَلَ لَكُمُ ٱلسَّمۡعَ وَٱلۡأَبۡصَٰرَ وَٱلۡأَفۡـِٔدَةَ لَعَلَّكُمۡ تَشۡكُرُونَ
It is God who brought you out of your mothers’ wombs knowing nothing, and gave you hearing and sight and minds, so that you might be thankful
Qur’an 16:78read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
What the research says
A systematic review and meta analysis found physical activity associated with better mental health in preschoolers, children and adolescents, with small pooled effects across a large number of studies. With young people especially, the thing they will actually engage with is worth more than the thing that sounds serious. That review was about activity rather than about biofeedback games, so the link here is a practical judgement.
Rodriguez-Ayllon M, Cadenas-Sánchez C, Estévez-López F, Muñoz NE, Mora-Gonzalez J, Migueles JH, Molina-García P, Henriksson H, Mena-Molina A, Martínez-Vizcaíno V, Catena A, Löf M, Erickson KI, Lubans DR, Ortega FB, Esteban-Cornejo I. (2019). Role of Physical Activity and Sedentary Behavior in the Mental Health of Preschoolers, Children and Adolescents: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis.. Sports medicine (Auckland, N.Z.) doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
Why it works
You cannot force yourself into a settled state, and you can get absorbed in something, which does the same job from the side.
This one is still a draft. It is waiting on a scholar and a clinician to read it before it is published.
Near this one
Aim low on purpose. Not the best day of your life. I like my cat. I got here on time.
Coming alive at night is a common pattern after trauma. Mornings are flat, the day is heavy, and something lifts around the time you are meant to be winding down.
Neurofeedback has its strongest support in attention difficulties, decent support in depression and anxiety, and for trauma it is promising rather than proven.