Practices
Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.
Narrowed down
3 practicesHow long you have
Who it is written for · My husband or wife
On your own, or with someone · Both of us together
Theme · Equanimity and perspective
Approach
You do not actually know what they are about to say, or why they did it. Swapping the finished sentence in your head for help me understand costs nothing and changes the whole exchange.
Finishing people's sentences, deciding in advance what they meant, hearing the insult before it has been made: all of it feels like insight and most…
You do not have to jump straight to understanding. Try the step before it: hands open, honestly puzzled, help me see what just happened here.
It has to be a real question. The rhetorical version, asked with your jaw set, makes things worse and both of you know it. Ask, then stay quiet long…
You can be completely right and still lose the room. Usually the trouble is not the point you are making, it is the edge you are making it with.
Softening how you say something is not conceding it. It is the difference between being heard and being braced against. Listen for the tells in your…
Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.