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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

2 practices
The moment before you snap remove filterBoth of us together remove filterAfter a row remove filterClear all
How long you have
Five minutes 1Twenty minutes 1
Who it is written for
Me 2My husband or wife 2Someone I care about 1A practitioner 1
Where you are right now
Struggling right now 1Coping, mostly 1
On your own, or with someone · Both of us together
On my own 4Both of us together 2Involves someone else 1
Theme · The moment before you snap
Feelings and focus 8Equanimity and perspective 4What anger actually is 3Cool the body first 3When you go numb 2The moment before you snap 2Growing empathy 2Emotions as signals 2The cost of avoiding 2Facing it a step at a time 1Remembering to do it 1Use your strengths 1Treatment and medication 1Your sense of time 1When anger turns to harm 1

While the feeling is at full volume, no argument gets through, including a good one of your own. Settle the body first and talk afterwards.

Reasoning with someone at their peak, or with yourself, nearly always adds heat rather than sense. The order that works is calm, then conversation:…

Five minutesThe moment before you snapCoreQur’an 2:45

In a bad moment your attention, your seeing and your remembering all narrow onto the threat. So your memory of the row is a partial recording, and so is theirs.

Worth holding on to before you go back over who said what. Neither of you is necessarily lying when the two accounts differ. Starting with here is…

Twenty minutesThe moment before you snapCoreQur’an 7:154

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.