Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

17 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone · On my own
Theme · Breathing
Your nervous system 81Medication and how it works 69Get started 61Systems for daily life 52What anger actually is 50Your sense of time 48Food, caffeine and fuel 43The moment before you snap 42Choosing your response 41Exercise, food and other supports 40Moving your body 37What ADHD actually is 35Treatment and medication 34Equanimity and perspective 33Bringing the future closer 33Grounding and settling 31The fear underneath anger 30When everything feels flat 29Screens and attention 28Touch and bodywork 27Getting assessed and diagnosed 25Structure and routine 25Practising under provocation 24Feelings and focus 22Shame and stigma 22Making it stick 20What worry does 19Cool the body first 19Treatment and medication 19Being seen and judged 18Remembering to do it 17Breathing 17Growing empathy 17Feeling from the inside 15When you use something to cope 15What you are actually defending 13Reading, numbers and learning differences 12Fondness and admiration 12Obsessions and compulsions 10Answering bids 10Tolerate distress 10Righteous anger and perfectionism 10Staying regulated in conflict 9Use your strengths 8Knowing your partner 8Self-compassion 8Breaking the worry loop 7Gratitude 7Shared spiritual life 7Facing it a step at a time 7Emotions as signals 6Question the thought 6Anger, alcohol and the body 6Posture and how you carry yourself 5Shame 4When you go numb 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Your worth is not conditional 3Living with uncertainty 3When anger turns to harm 3Meaning after harm 2Rest and pacing 2Repair after rupture 2Face it gently 2Work with your brain 2Keep the bond 2Get it out of your head 2Find meaning 2Act on your values 2Affection and touch 1Safety and grounding 1Rebuilding trust 1Panic and the body 1Listening and understanding 1Listen to the body 1Your window of tolerance 1Care for yourself in loss 1The cost of avoiding 1
When · Any ordinary day

The famous count is not automatically your count. One teacher finds that adding a pause after the inhale wakes her up, while the plain long exhale has her asleep within three breaths.

Protocols get passed around because they worked for someone, often someone with a large audience. That is not the same as fitting you. Keep the shape…

A minuteBreathingBody basedQur’an 3:191

When you are flat rather than wound up, try this. Rub your palms together until they feel awake, let them rest, then breathe in as your arms lift and out as they lower, two or three times.

Sluggish, heavy, far away: those states rarely respond to more calming. A bit of friction in the hands, some movement through the arms and a fuller…

A minuteBreathingBody basedQur’an 20:25

Breath is the quickest way you have of turning your own nervous system up or down. Nothing else you can simply decide to do works on that timescale.

Your heart rate already rises slightly as you breathe in and falls as you breathe out, on every breath. So changing how you breathe changes something…

A minuteBreathingBody basedQur’an 48:4

Put a hand just below your ribs and let it move. Most of us breathe up in the chest, and the settling effect comes from lower down, where the diaphragm can actually shift.

You can check this lying down with a book on your stomach. If the book rises, the breath is going where you want it. If only your shoulders move, it…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 15:29

Hot yoga asks you to keep drinking all the way through the class. If forgetting to eat and drink is one of your regular problems, choose a different room.

This is not about the style being bad. It is about matching what you choose to the things you genuinely find hard. Dehydration creeps up quietly and…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 94:5

There is no breath that calms everyone. The one that settles your friend may leave you worse, and that is information about your body rather than a failure in you.

Labels like calming or energising are a rough guide at best. What actually happens depends on how you usually breathe, what your body has been…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 50:16

Start with a count of four in and four out, then drop the count. Once the rhythm is there your body will choose its own length: six and six, eight and eight, whatever settles you.

The count is scaffolding. Holding onto it too long turns the practice into something you can pass or fail, which is the opposite of the point.…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 81:18

Rather than pulling in a big breath, breathe gently and slightly less than you want to, then wait. The deep breath that arrives by itself does more than the one you force.

Keep the breathing light and unhurried, and after a while a mild hunger for air builds. Let it build a little. At some point the body takes a fuller…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 94:5

Holding your breath for a moment makes the next one deeper, which sounds backwards until you know why. The urge to breathe is driven by carbon dioxide, not by a shortage of air.

Sensors in the brainstem watch the level of carbon dioxide in your blood, and a pause, especially after breathing out, lets it rise a little. The…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 15:29

The three ordinary breaths between rounds are not a gap in the practice. They are where you find out what the practice did.

Come back to normal breathing and check the body, the thoughts, the mood, the energy. Do not analyse it, just register it. Going round after round…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 39:23

To find the soft ocean sounding breath, breathe out through your mouth as if fogging up a mirror. Then keep that same slight narrowing at the throat with your mouth closed, and let the sound get quieter and quieter.

Starting with the mirror gives you something to do instead of an anatomy lesson about a part of the throat you cannot see. Once the mouth closes, the…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 7:205

Close your right nostril with your thumb and breathe in through the left. Swap fingers at the top, breathe out through the right, in through the right, then out through the left. That is one round.

The fiddliness is not a flaw in the design. Keeping track of which nostril and which stage takes up just enough of your mind that there is little…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 13:28

These practices are not only pleasant. They change things you could measure, which is worth knowing on the days when pleasant is not reason enough to bother.

Yoga and breath work tend to get filed under relaxation, and that undersells them. There are claims made about them shifting the chemistry involved…

Twenty minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 32:9

A good instructor says light, moderate, heavy. A poor one says set the dial to three. Only one of those takes account of the body you actually brought with you.

Fixed settings guarantee that somebody in the room is working far too hard and somebody else is barely working at all. If you tend to go flat out and…

Twenty minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 65:7

There are two skills here rather than one: letting your body move and settle in its own way, and being able to steer yourself deliberately towards rest or alertness. It is worth having both.

Most people are strong in one and shy of the other. If you always take charge, your body never gets to finish anything on its own. If you only ever…

Twenty minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 2:153

How often you actually do it matters more than which version you chose. The people who keep turning up tend to get more out of it, and those who carry on at home get more again.

This is quietly encouraging, because an unimpressive practice done regularly beats an ideal one you manage twice. It also sets the expectation…

LongerBreathingBody basedQur’an 4:103

Part of why martial arts suit some people has little to do with the kicking. Every session opens with a plan and closes with a look back at what happened and what comes next.

Those brackets at each end are doing quiet work: planning, then reviewing, then planning again, which are exactly the things that are hard to hold in…

LongerBreathingBody basedQur’an 7:205

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.