Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

23 practices

Tolerate distress On my own Clear all

How long you have

A minute 7 Five minutes 8 Twenty minutes 6 Longer 2

Who it is written for

Me 23 A practitioner 20 Someone I care about 13

Where you are right now

Struggling right now 13 Coping, mostly 8 Getting ready for something 2

On your own, or with someone · On my own

On my own 23 Involves someone else 4

Theme · Tolerate distress

Your nervous system 108Medication and how it works 83 What anger actually is 83 The moment before you snap 76 Choosing your response 73 Get started 65 Systems for daily life 62 Grounding and settling 60 Equanimity and perspective 57 The fear underneath anger 57 Cool the body first 55 Touch and bodywork 52 Your sense of time 52 Food, caffeine and fuel 49 What ADHD actually is 49 Moving your body 48 Bringing the future closer 46 Exercise, food and other supports 44 When everything feels flat 44 Treatment and medication 43 Getting assessed and diagnosed 42 Feelings and focus 38 Staying regulated in conflict 36 Practising under provocation 36 Screens and attention 31 Shame and stigma 30 Making it stick 29 Breathing 28 Structure and routine 25 What worry does 24 Treatment and medication 24 Feeling from the inside 23 Tolerate distress 23 Being seen and judged 22 What you are actually defending 21 Growing empathy 20 Remembering to do it 20 When you use something to cope 19 Reading, numbers and learning differences 14 Obsessions and compulsions 13 Breaking the worry loop 13 Righteous anger and perfectionism 13 Fondness and admiration 13 Answering bids 13 Emotions as signals 12 Self-compassion 12 Facing it a step at a time 11 Question the thought 11 Shame 10 Knowing your partner 10 Use your strengths 9 Posture and how you carry yourself 8 Repair after rupture 8 Anger, alcohol and the body 8 Gratitude 7 Shared spiritual life 7 When anger turns to harm 7 Meaning after harm 4 Letting it out safely 4 When you go numb 4 Living with uncertainty 4 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Act on your values 3 Safety and grounding 3 Rest and pacing 3 Rebuilding trust 3 Working with anger 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Name what you feel 3 Let the wave come 3 Calm the body 3 Ride the urge 2 Work with your brain 2 Your window of tolerance 2 Listen to the body 2 Rituals of connection 2 Keep the bond 2 Hold a boundary 2 Patience and trust 2 Get it out of your head 2 Find meaning 2 Face it gently 2 Care for yourself in loss 2 Affection and touch 2 The cost of avoiding 2 Panic and the body 2 Listening and understanding 1 Validate yourself and others 1

Approach

DBT skills 11 Body based 10 Mindfulness 2

When

Any ordinary day 10 Under stress 10 After a row 3

When one bit of you wants to let the feeling come and another bit is frightened of it, you are not being difficult. You are two things at once, and both of them have their reasons.

The frightened side is usually the one that kept you going for years, so shoving past it tends to make it dig in harder. It works better to turn…

Twenty minutesTolerate distressBody basedQur’an 16:127

When a feeling is genuinely unbearable, escaping it is the only regulator you have, so the drinking or the shutting down is doing a job. Build up what you can bear and the job disappears.

It helps to stop asking why you keep reaching for the thing and start asking what state you were in just before you reached. Usually it is a…

LongerTolerate distressDBT skillsQur’an 41:49

Before you go anywhere near the hard memory, you need to be able to stay in your own body while something difficult is happening in it. That capacity is part of the work, not a delay before it starts.

Phase based approaches put this first for a plain reason: people who cannot bear the arousal either drop out or push through and come away worse. If…

LongerTolerate distressDBT skillsQur’an 3:200

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.