Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

16 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now · Coping, mostly
On your own, or with someone · On my own
Theme · Treatment and medication
Medication and how it works 52Your nervous system 52What anger actually is 45Choosing your response 41Get started 41The moment before you snap 39Systems for daily life 39The fear underneath anger 38Staying regulated in conflict 36Equanimity and perspective 36Your sense of time 31Bringing the future closer 30Moving your body 30Touch and bodywork 30Treatment and medication 27Getting assessed and diagnosed 26When everything feels flat 26Exercise, food and other supports 26Feelings and focus 25Grounding and settling 22What ADHD actually is 21Food, caffeine and fuel 19Practising under provocation 19Cool the body first 18Making it stick 18Structure and routine 18Screens and attention 17What you are actually defending 17What worry does 17Treatment and medication 16Growing empathy 15Breathing 15Fondness and admiration 13Answering bids 13Being seen and judged 12Feeling from the inside 12Shame and stigma 12Righteous anger and perfectionism 12Remembering to do it 11Knowing your partner 10Self-compassion 8Tolerate distress 8Emotions as signals 8Repair after rupture 8Shared spiritual life 7Use your strengths 7When you use something to cope 7Breaking the worry loop 7Gratitude 7Anger, alcohol and the body 6Facing it a step at a time 6When anger turns to harm 5Question the thought 5Meaning after harm 4Notice the pattern and flex 3Act on your values 3Safety and grounding 3Your worth is not conditional 3Working with anger 3Rebuilding trust 3Posture and how you carry yourself 3Let the wave come 3Calm the body 3Name what you feel 3Affection and touch 2Keep the bond 2Reading, numbers and learning differences 2Listen to the body 2Get it out of your head 2Obsessions and compulsions 2Patience and trust 2Rest and pacing 2Ride the urge 2Rituals of connection 2Find meaning 2Face it gently 2Your window of tolerance 2Work with your brain 2Care for yourself in loss 2Hold a boundary 2Living with uncertainty 1The cost of avoiding 1Panic and the body 1When you go numb 1Listening and understanding 1Validate yourself and others 1

The chapter a diagnosis sits in was decided by a committee, and the medicines did not rearrange themselves to match. When you are thinking about treatment, it helps to look past the name on the file to what the person is actually carrying.

Anxiety used to sit in one place in the manual and now sits in three, with trauma conditions and obsessive ones given rooms of their own. That…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 49:6

Nothing you take can act on something that is not there to be acted on. It is a plain limit, and it explains a good deal of the disappointment people carry about treatment.

A medicine travels everywhere in the body and only does something where there is something for it to work through. So the question is not whether a…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 41:44

If you do not know how much of something you are taking, you cannot tell whether it is helping you. That is the honest problem with most calming products bought off the shelf, quite apart from whether the ingredient works.

Testing of these products keeps turning up contents that do not match the label, sometimes including things the label never mentions. So a good week…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:36

With anything you use to take the edge off, note what you took and when, and how you felt a few hours later. Small changes in amount can turn the same substance from calming into the opposite.

Cannabis is the clearest example. Strength and make up vary enormously between products, a small amount often settles people, and a larger amount…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

A small dose that has not changed in years is not automatically something to fix. Stopping carries risks of its own, and they have to be weighed rather than assumed away.

Coming off can bring withdrawal, a rebound of the original anxiety, and worse if it is done abruptly. Set against the risks of staying on, which are…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 39:53

Plenty of people carry a tablet for years and almost never take it. What it is mostly doing is reassurance, and that is worth knowing about it.

Being able to reach for it is what makes the shop or the motorway bearable, which is a real help and a quiet cost at the same time. The cost is that…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:186

One medicine can reach both the surging kind of anxiety and the circling kind, while another really only touches the surging kind. That is why the slower and broader option is usually the one people are started on.

It explains a pattern that looks arbitrary from the outside. The broad option is unglamorous: nothing happens on the first day and it takes weeks to…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:82

Making someone calmer is not the same as treating what is making them anxious. Obsessive worry is the clearest case: something sedating can take the edge off the distress and leave whatever drives it completely untouched.

You can see it in the shape of the day. The person is quieter, slower, maybe sleeping better, and the same thought arrives just as often as it did.…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 10:57

Ask what symptom you are aiming at rather than what the diagnosis is called. Nothing anyone takes recognises a category; it acts on whatever is happening in the body.

In practice that means naming the target out loud before anything is started or changed: the surges that come from nowhere, the sleeplessness, the…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 39:9

Anxiety comes in two rough families. Fear is the sudden bodily kind that arrives in a rush, and worry is the slow kind that circles and will not settle.

The distinction earns its place because the two behave differently. Fear peaks and passes and shows up in the heart and the breath, while worry sits…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 20:114

Physical dependence on a sedative can build while you are taking it exactly as prescribed. Nothing has gone wrong with you and nobody has misused anything.

Regulators strengthened the warnings across this whole class of medicines to say so plainly, including that withdrawal can be drawn out. Knowing it…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 24:61

The number worth watching is not the dose but the direction. A dose that keeps creeping upward says something that a steady one does not.

You are often the person who sees this, because you hear about it in passing across months while the prescriber sees someone twice a year. Note it…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 42:38

Before choosing what to try, work out which kind of anxiety you are dealing with. What settles a sudden surge and what wears down months of low grade worry are rarely the same thing.

For the surging kind, the things that help act fast and work on the body. For the worrying kind, they are slower and work on how the days are built:…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 38:41

Some anxiety medicines have no fast setting at all. They work on the receiving side of the system and take two to four weeks to show anything, so taking one in a bad moment does nothing and proves nothing.

For the right person the trade is a good one: nothing to become dependent on, no withdrawal, no dangerous mixing with alcohol, and nothing to reach…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

The gentler alternatives are for avoiding a habit forming medicine in the first place. They cannot carry someone who is already dependent, and offering one as a straight swap mid crisis sets everybody up to fail.

Once a body has adapted to one of these medicines, only a careful reduction of that same medicine will get a person off it, and a different drug will…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 39:53

Take a few photographs of your bedroom, then look at them later and circle whatever has to change or go. Seeing the room in a picture shows you things you stopped noticing years ago while standing in it.

The list is usually short and dull: the light on a charger, the pile of unfinished things on the chair, the television, the clock you keep checking.…

Twenty minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 13:11

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.