Inshirahone small thing, well grounded
GuidesPracticesAboutGet help nowInshirah Academy

Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

65 practices
Core remove filterAfter a row remove filterClear all
Area
Anger 50Your marriage 13Focus, starting, and ADHD 2
How long you have
A minute 19Five minutes 40Twenty minutes 6
Who it is written for
Me 57A practitioner 49Someone I care about 37My husband or wife 21
Where you are right now
Coping, mostly 44Struggling right now 21
On your own, or with someone
On my own 45Involves someone else 13Both of us together 7
Theme
What anger actually is 22The fear underneath anger 10Staying regulated in conflict 7The moment before you snap 5Repair after rupture 5Equanimity and perspective 4When anger turns to harm 3Screens and attention 2What you are actually defending 2Choosing your response 2Righteous anger and perfectionism 1Making it stick 1Fondness and admiration 1
Approach · Core
Core 65ADHD skills 34Emotionally focused 33Gottman 23CBT 18Mindfulness 15Body based 12Medical and treatment 4DBT skills 4Trauma informed 2
When · After a row
Any ordinary day 279Under stress 113After a row 65In a change 6Coming and going 6Something good 4When apart 1

Being late on purpose, the joke with an edge, the job done just badly enough: that is anger at full strength, only sent by a quieter route.

People who do this often say honestly that they never get angry, and they believe it, because what they are picturing is shouting. The feeling is all…

Five minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 2:263

Anger feels righteous while it lasts. The useful moment comes later, when the regret shows up and the story has gone quiet.

Nobody changes course mid-shout, and pressing then only adds fuel. Hours or a day afterwards there is usually a stretch where a person is…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 21:87

Some anger arrives with an argument already inside it: that they disrespected you, that this is not how you are meant to be treated. It burns cooler than the sudden kind and it lasts much longer.

Because it is made of a story, it can be handled at the level of the story. What did that gesture actually mean. What would it mean if they were…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 5:8

Demanding respect quietly puts you below the person you are demanding it from. You are asking for something only they can hand over, which makes you the one in need.

That is an odd position for a stance meant to prove you will not be pushed around. To anyone watching it usually reads as need rather than strength.…

Five minutesWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 28:83

Say what you would prefer and what you will do, not what they have to feel. I do not like being spoken to this way, and if it carries on I am going to step out of the conversation.

The difference is small and it changes everything. A demand needs their cooperation to succeed, so it can be refused, and being refused is where the…

Five minutesWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 42:41

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.