Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

5 practices

What you are actually defending A minute Someone I care about Clear all

How long you have · A minute

A minute 5 Five minutes 15 Twenty minutes 1 Longer 1

Who it is written for · Someone I care about

Me 6 Someone I care about 5 A practitioner 5 My husband or wife 1

On your own, or with someone

On my own 4 Involves someone else 1

Theme · What you are actually defending

Cool the body first 26 Grounding and settling 24 Systems for daily life 24 The fear underneath anger 22 Your nervous system 21 Your sense of time 16 What anger actually is 16 Bringing the future closer 15 Medication and how it works 14 Structure and routine 13 The moment before you snap 12 Equanimity and perspective 12 Moving your body 9 Exercise, food and other supports 9 What ADHD actually is 8 The cost of avoiding 8 Tolerate distress 7 Breathing 7 Choosing your response 7 Growing empathy 7 Making it stick 7 Remembering to do it 7 Screens and attention 7 Treatment and medication 6 Food, caffeine and fuel 6 What worry does 6 What you are actually defending 5 Shame and stigma 5 Get started 5 When everything feels flat 4 Practising under provocation 4 Shame 4 Self-compassion 3 When you use something to cope 3 Emotions as signals 2 Breaking the worry loop 2 When anger turns to harm 2 Reading, numbers and learning differences 2 Righteous anger and perfectionism 2 Feelings and focus 2 Facing it a step at a time 2 Feeling from the inside 2 Obsessions and compulsions 2 Anger, alcohol and the body 1 Touch and bodywork 1 Help someone grieving 1 Getting assessed and diagnosed 1 Letting it out safely 1

Approach

Core 3 Mindfulness 2

When

Under stress 3 Any ordinary day 2

Respect comes from the Latin for looking, with the prefix meaning again. It is literally the second look, the head that turns as somebody important walks past.

Knowing that does something useful. A word that felt close to sacred turns into a plain social behaviour you can examine: who gets looked at twice,…

A minuteWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 31:18

Disrespect is a paper tiger. It comes at you looking like something, and it has never once actually done you any damage.

Worth noticing what your body does anyway. The heart goes, the jaw sets, and you get ready as though something physical were about to happen. The…

A minuteWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 25:63

When your thinking comes back online mid-argument, say so and offer a restart. I could feel myself getting defensive and this is not helping either of us, shall we try that again?

Most people escalate sometimes. The skill worth having is not never starting but knowing how to get out once you have. Naming it yourself gives the…

A minuteWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 12:92

Anger and doubt cannot really occupy the same moment. Anger sharpens everything to a point, and a genuine maybe blunts it.

This is why an honest question does more than an argument. Not a challenge, which hardens things, but a real one: what if I have got part of this…

A minuteWhat you are actually defendingMindfulnessQur’an 2:206

Your mind is always slightly behind what is happening. Reality moves and you are the response, which leaves you permanently a step late and permanently not quite sure.

Put that way, uncertainty is not a flaw in your thinking, it is the position you are standing in. You are flying into the next moment without having…

A minuteWhat you are actually defendingMindfulnessQur’an 16:23

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.