Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

3 practices

Shame Five minutes Any ordinary day Clear all

How long you have · Five minutes

A minute 1 Five minutes 3 Twenty minutes 2 Longer 1

Who it is written for

A practitioner 3 Me 3 Someone I care about 2 My husband or wife 1

Where you are right now

Struggling right now 2 Coping, mostly 1

On your own, or with someone

On my own 2 Involves someone else 1

Theme · Shame

Medication and how it works 99 Your nervous system 54 Getting assessed and diagnosed 43 Systems for daily life 36 Exercise, food and other supports 35 What anger actually is 35 Your sense of time 35 Get started 33 Food, caffeine and fuel 29 What ADHD actually is 28 Equanimity and perspective 27 The moment before you snap 26 When everything feels flat 23 Screens and attention 23 Choosing your response 23 Treatment and medication 22 Bringing the future closer 22 Practising under provocation 22 Touch and bodywork 22 What worry does 20 Grounding and settling 19 The fear underneath anger 17 Moving your body 17 Shame and stigma 15 Reading, numbers and learning differences 14 Being seen and judged 14 Cool the body first 13 Structure and routine 13 Remembering to do it 11 Feeling from the inside 10 Breathing 10 Growing empathy 10 Feelings and focus 10 What you are actually defending 10 Making it stick 9 Righteous anger and perfectionism 9 The cost of avoiding 9 Treatment and medication 9 Obsessions and compulsions 8 Breaking the worry loop 8 When you use something to cope 8 Emotions as signals 7 Facing it a step at a time 7 Knowing your partner 6 Self-compassion 4 Tolerate distress 4 Shared spiritual life 4 Rituals of connection 3 When you go numb 3 Shame 3 Posture and how you carry yourself 3 Act on your values 2 Use your strengths 2 Work with your brain 2 When anger turns to harm 2 Find meaning 2 Question the thought 2 Panic and the body 2 Listening and understanding 2 Meaning after harm 2 Rest and pacing 1 Staying regulated in conflict 1 Anger, alcohol and the body 1 Your worth is not conditional 1 Get it out of your head 1 Your window of tolerance 1 Notice the pattern and flex 1 Face it gently 1 Living with uncertainty 1 Rebuilding trust 1 Affection and touch 1

Approach

Trauma informed 2 Emotionally focused 1

When · Any ordinary day

Any ordinary day 3 After a row 2 Under stress 2

You did not choose which things hurt you. Where you are tender was set long before you had any say in it, and the only live question is what you do with it now.

This is worth saying out loud between two people, because each usually thinks their own soft spot is embarrassing and the other's is obvious. Try…

Five minutesShameEmotionally focusedQur’an 30:54

Shame speaks in one flat sentence: I am bad. Notice that it never offers evidence, it just announces a verdict.

Because the claim covers all of you, no good day can disprove it. That is what makes it different from ordinary regret, which points at one thing you…

Five minutesShameTrauma informedQur’an 95:4

You were the child. They were the adults. Say it as often as you need to, because shame will keep quietly filing it the other way round.

It is not an argument to win, more a fact to keep returning to. When a memory arrives with you cast as the guilty one, try describing the same scene…

Five minutesShameTrauma informedQur’an 49:11

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.