Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

18 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now · Coping, mostly
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Breathing
Medication and how it works 97Systems for daily life 69Getting assessed and diagnosed 54Your nervous system 47Get started 47Moving your body 43Exercise, food and other supports 40Treatment and medication 39What anger actually is 37Your sense of time 37Bringing the future closer 36Touch and bodywork 30What ADHD actually is 28Equanimity and perspective 26Screens and attention 26Growing empathy 25When everything feels flat 25The moment before you snap 25Structure and routine 25Choosing your response 24Food, caffeine and fuel 23Feelings and focus 23What worry does 22Grounding and settling 21The fear underneath anger 20Treatment and medication 20Knowing your partner 20The cost of avoiding 19Breathing 18Shared spiritual life 16Being seen and judged 16Practising under provocation 15Making it stick 15Fondness and admiration 14Breaking the worry loop 14Shame and stigma 13What you are actually defending 13Righteous anger and perfectionism 13Remembering to do it 13Answering bids 12Staying regulated in conflict 11When you use something to cope 10Listening and understanding 10Reading, numbers and learning differences 10Emotions as signals 10Feeling from the inside 10Gratitude 9Use your strengths 7Rituals of connection 7Affection and touch 7Self-compassion 6Cool the body first 6When anger turns to harm 6Rebuilding trust 5Obsessions and compulsions 5Tolerate distress 5Facing it a step at a time 5Anger, alcohol and the body 5Posture and how you carry yourself 4Repair after rupture 3Panic and the body 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Your worth is not conditional 3Question the thought 3Face it gently 2Act on your values 2Meaning after harm 2Keep the bond 2Get it out of your head 2Work with your brain 2Find meaning 2Rest and pacing 2Living with uncertainty 1When you go numb 1Shame 1Care for yourself in loss 1Safety and grounding 1Listen to the body 1Your window of tolerance 1
When · Any ordinary day

The famous count is not automatically your count. One teacher finds that adding a pause after the inhale wakes her up, while the plain long exhale has her asleep within three breaths.

Protocols get passed around because they worked for someone, often someone with a large audience. That is not the same as fitting you. Keep the shape…

A minuteBreathingBody basedQur’an 3:191

Breath is the quickest way you have of turning your own nervous system up or down. Nothing else you can simply decide to do works on that timescale.

Your heart rate already rises slightly as you breathe in and falls as you breathe out, on every breath. So changing how you breathe changes something…

A minuteBreathingBody basedQur’an 48:4

The rapid belly driven breath with pauses added is the strongest thing in this set. Not for high blood pressure, glaucoma, pregnancy or your period, and stop at once with pain or dizziness.

It has its uses for the flat, heavy state that comes over people after lunch or during a long low patch, because it pushes upwards rather than down.…

A minuteBreathingBody basedQur’an 38:72

End a practice with a question rather than a conclusion. What do you notice works better than telling someone what should have happened.

If you announce that an exercise is calming, most people will agree with you whether or not it was. Asking leaves room for the honest answer,…

A minuteBreathingBody basedQur’an 50:16

Put a hand just below your ribs and let it move. Most of us breathe up in the chest, and the settling effect comes from lower down, where the diaphragm can actually shift.

You can check this lying down with a book on your stomach. If the book rises, the breath is going where you want it. If only your shoulders move, it…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 15:29

A child cannot watch their own breathing, so give them something to watch instead. Bubbles through a wand show the out breath as it happens: too hard and it bursts, too weak and nothing comes.

Smelling a flower and then blowing it out gives each half of the breath a picture. The bubble wand is better still, because it answers back straight…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 81:18

There is no breath that calms everyone. The one that settles your friend may leave you worse, and that is information about your body rather than a failure in you.

Labels like calming or energising are a rough guide at best. What actually happens depends on how you usually breathe, what your body has been…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 50:16

Start with a count of four in and four out, then drop the count. Once the rhythm is there your body will choose its own length: six and six, eight and eight, whatever settles you.

The count is scaffolding. Holding onto it too long turns the practice into something you can pass or fail, which is the opposite of the point.…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 81:18

Rather than pulling in a big breath, breathe gently and slightly less than you want to, then wait. The deep breath that arrives by itself does more than the one you force.

Keep the breathing light and unhurried, and after a while a mild hunger for air builds. Let it build a little. At some point the body takes a fuller…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 94:5

Holding your breath for a moment makes the next one deeper, which sounds backwards until you know why. The urge to breathe is driven by carbon dioxide, not by a shortage of air.

Sensors in the brainstem watch the level of carbon dioxide in your blood, and a pause, especially after breathing out, lets it rise a little. The…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 15:29

The three ordinary breaths between rounds are not a gap in the practice. They are where you find out what the practice did.

Come back to normal breathing and check the body, the thoughts, the mood, the energy. Do not analyse it, just register it. Going round after round…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 39:23

To find the soft ocean sounding breath, breathe out through your mouth as if fogging up a mirror. Then keep that same slight narrowing at the throat with your mouth closed, and let the sound get quieter and quieter.

Starting with the mirror gives you something to do instead of an anatomy lesson about a part of the throat you cannot see. Once the mouth closes, the…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 7:205

Close your right nostril with your thumb and breathe in through the left. Swap fingers at the top, breathe out through the right, in through the right, then out through the left. That is one round.

The fiddliness is not a flaw in the design. Keeping track of which nostril and which stage takes up just enough of your mind that there is little…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 13:28

These practices are not only pleasant. They change things you could measure, which is worth knowing on the days when pleasant is not reason enough to bother.

Yoga and breath work tend to get filed under relaxation, and that undersells them. There are claims made about them shifting the chemistry involved…

Twenty minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 32:9

Go slowly enough to learn something about yourself, rather than only a technique. What is worth keeping is knowing which breath does what in your body.

One round is rarely enough to tell. Try a breath for a minute or two, stop, and check what shifted: the chest, the shoulders, how loud your thoughts…

Twenty minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 73:4

There are two skills here rather than one: letting your body move and settle in its own way, and being able to steer yourself deliberately towards rest or alertness. It is worth having both.

Most people are strong in one and shy of the other. If you always take charge, your body never gets to finish anything on its own. If you only ever…

Twenty minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 2:153

How often you actually do it matters more than which version you chose. The people who keep turning up tend to get more out of it, and those who carry on at home get more again.

This is quietly encouraging, because an unimpressive practice done regularly beats an ideal one you manage twice. It also sets the expectation…

LongerBreathingBody basedQur’an 4:103

Part of why martial arts suit some people has little to do with the kicking. Every session opens with a plan and closes with a look back at what happened and what comes next.

Those brackets at each end are doing quiet work: planning, then reviewing, then planning again, which are exactly the things that are hard to hold in…

LongerBreathingBody basedQur’an 7:205

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.