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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

4 practices

Tolerate distress Coping, mostly Under stress Clear all

How long you have

A minute 2 Five minutes 2

Who it is written for

Me 4 Someone I care about 1 A practitioner 1

Where you are right now · Coping, mostly

Struggling right now 5 Coping, mostly 4 Getting ready for something 2

Theme · Tolerate distress

Staying regulated in conflict 20 Choosing your response 17 The fear underneath anger 14 The moment before you snap 14 Cool the body first 12 Your nervous system 11 Answering bids 9 Feelings and focus 8 Equanimity and perspective 8 What anger actually is 8 Touch and bodywork 7 Affection and touch 6 Knowing your partner 5 Practising under provocation 4 What you are actually defending 4 Making it stick 4 Getting assessed and diagnosed 4 Tolerate distress 4 Facing it a step at a time 4 Let the wave come 3 When anger turns to harm 3 Listening and understanding 3 Calm the body 3 Name what you feel 3 Safety and grounding 3 Working with anger 3 Ride the urge 2 When everything feels flat 2 Feeling from the inside 2 Grounding and settling 2 Rebuild trust 2 Question the thought 2 The cost of avoiding 2 Patience and trust 2 Emotions as signals 2 Righteous anger and perfectionism 2 Meaning after harm 2 Shame and stigma 1 Breathing 1 Bringing the future closer 1 Care for yourself in loss 1 When you use something to cope 1 Food, caffeine and fuel 1 Growing empathy 1 Listen to the body 1 Medication and how it works 1 Obsessions and compulsions 1 Repair after rupture 1 Shame 1 Act on your values 1 Shared spiritual life 1 Validate yourself and others 1 What worry does 1 Your window of tolerance 1

Approach

DBT skills 2 Mindfulness 2

When · Under stress

Any ordinary day 5 Under stress 4 After a row 1

Tell yourself the true thing: this feeling is real, and it is temporary. No state lasts. Ride it out.

You do not have to fix it right now. You only have to outlast it. Feelings crest and fall like weather.

A minuteTolerate distressMindfulnessQur’an 93:5

Wise mind is not a calmer version of you. It is the state where what you feel and what you have thought through are both in the room, and neither has thrown the other out.

In practice it means you can feel the heat in your chest and still choose the next sentence. Neither half is the enemy: pure logic talks you out of…

A minuteTolerate distressDBT skillsQur’an 12:18

Stop fighting what already is. Accepting a hard reality, without approving of it, ends the extra layer of pain.

Saying it is so is not the same as saying it is fine. Dropping the war with what already happened frees you to respond.

Five minutesTolerate distressDBT skillsQur’an 64:11

Soothe yourself through the senses: a warm drink, a soft cloth, a good scent, a slow walk. Be kind to the body.

When you cannot fix the feeling, comfort the one who is feeling it. Small kindnesses to the body settle the mind.

Five minutesTolerate distressMindfulnessQur’an 93:6

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.