Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

5 practices

Emotions as signals A minute Coping, mostly Clear all

How long you have · A minute

A minute 5 Five minutes 12 Twenty minutes 3

Who it is written for

A practitioner 5 My husband or wife 5 Me 3 Someone I care about 2

On your own, or with someone

On my own 2 Involves someone else 2 Both of us together 1

Theme · Emotions as signals

Staying regulated in conflict 46 Choosing your response 25 Answering bids 22 The fear underneath anger 18 Medication and how it works 18 The moment before you snap 17 Bringing the future closer 17 Your nervous system 15 Fondness and admiration 15 Equanimity and perspective 14 Knowing your partner 14 Affection and touch 14 Get started 13 What anger actually is 13 Repair after rupture 13 Systems for daily life 13 Your sense of time 12 Cool the body first 12 Growing empathy 12 Treatment and medication 11 Structure and routine 10 Gratitude 9 Grounding and settling 9 Feelings and focus 8 Listening and understanding 8 When everything feels flat 8 Moving your body 7 Getting assessed and diagnosed 7 Exercise, food and other supports 6 Making it stick 6 Remembering to do it 6 Rituals of connection 6 Shared spiritual life 6 Touch and bodywork 6 Emotions as signals 5 Being seen and judged 5 What you are actually defending 5 Rebuilding trust 5 Screens and attention 5 Practising under provocation 4 Food, caffeine and fuel 4 Treatment and medication 4 Breathing 4 Shame and stigma 4 Tolerate distress 4 Name what you feel 3 Self-compassion 3 When you use something to cope 3 Question the thought 3 The cost of avoiding 3 What worry does 3 What ADHD actually is 3 Safety and grounding 3 Facing it a step at a time 2 Patience and trust 2 Meaning after harm 2 Ride the urge 2 Shame 2 Let the wave come 2 Reading, numbers and learning differences 2 When anger turns to harm 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Hold a boundary 2 Working with anger 2 Your worth is not conditional 2 Calm the body 2 Notice the pattern and flex 2 Obsessions and compulsions 2 Feeling from the inside 1 Panic and the body 1 Face it gently 1 Your window of tolerance 1 Keep the bond 1 Anger, alcohol and the body 1 Care for yourself in loss 1 Act on your values 1 Listen to the body 1 Ask and say no well 1 Breaking the worry loop 1 Righteous anger and perfectionism 1 Help someone grieving 1 Get it out of your head 1

When

Any ordinary day 3 Under stress 2

Every feeling comes with something it wants you to do. Catching the move before you make it is most of the skill.

Anger wants to push, fear wants to get out of the room, sadness wants to curl up, shame wants to disappear. None of that is wrong, and the trouble is…

A minuteEmotions as signalsEmotionally focusedQur’an 21:87

You do not need a long list of feeling words. Half a dozen you can actually reach for under pressure will do more than forty you have to look up.

Angry, sad, afraid, ashamed, surprised, glad is enough to start with, and most hard moments are some mixture of the first four. The aim is not to…

A minuteEmotions as signalsEmotionally focusedQur’an 91:8

If someone is saying so much that you have lost the thread, stop them kindly and check. Sorry, that is a lot and it matters, can I say back what I have got so far.

It feels rude and it is usually received as the opposite, because it says the words were worth keeping. Listening while quietly drowning helps…

A minuteEmotions as signalsEmotionally focusedQur’an 8:24

Point at the body. 'Your hands went up just then', or 'you put your head in your hands', gives a feeling something solid to stand on.

Feelings argued about in the abstract go round and round. A gesture you both just watched is much harder to dispute, and it opens a door: what was…

A minuteEmotions as signalsEmotionally focusedQur’an 39:23

When someone goes quiet and you can see they have gone inside, that is not your moment to help. Stay still and let the silence run.

You will feel the pull to summarise, to check they are alright, to bring the other person back in. All of it lands as an interruption. Give it a few…

A minuteEmotions as signalsEmotionally focusedQur’an 50:16

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.