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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

4 practices
Tolerate distress remove filterA minute remove filterCoping, mostly remove filterClear all
How long you have · A minute
A minute 4Five minutes 5Twenty minutes 1
Who it is written for
Someone I care about 3A practitioner 3Me 3
Where you are right now · Coping, mostly
Coping, mostly 4Struggling right now 4
On your own, or with someone
On my own 3Involves someone else 1
Theme · Tolerate distress
Staying regulated in conflict 46Choosing your response 25Answering bids 22Medication and how it works 18The fear underneath anger 18The moment before you snap 17Bringing the future closer 17Fondness and admiration 15Your nervous system 15Equanimity and perspective 14Knowing your partner 14Affection and touch 14Get started 13Systems for daily life 13Repair after rupture 13What anger actually is 13Growing empathy 12Your sense of time 12Cool the body first 12Treatment and medication 11Structure and routine 10Grounding and settling 9Gratitude 9Listening and understanding 8When everything feels flat 8Feelings and focus 8Moving your body 7Getting assessed and diagnosed 7Touch and bodywork 6Making it stick 6Exercise, food and other supports 6Remembering to do it 6Rituals of connection 6Shared spiritual life 6Screens and attention 5What you are actually defending 5Rebuilding trust 5Being seen and judged 5Emotions as signals 5Practising under provocation 4Tolerate distress 4Breathing 4Food, caffeine and fuel 4Shame and stigma 4Treatment and medication 4Name what you feel 3Question the thought 3What ADHD actually is 3When you use something to cope 3Safety and grounding 3Self-compassion 3What worry does 3The cost of avoiding 3Reading, numbers and learning differences 2When anger turns to harm 2Calm the body 2Facing it a step at a time 2Hold a boundary 2Let the wave come 2Meaning after harm 2Notice the pattern and flex 2Obsessions and compulsions 2Patience and trust 2Ride the urge 2Shame 2Validate yourself and others 2Working with anger 2Your worth is not conditional 2Breaking the worry loop 1Your window of tolerance 1Righteous anger and perfectionism 1Panic and the body 1Listen to the body 1Act on your values 1Keep the bond 1Help someone grieving 1Get it out of your head 1Feeling from the inside 1Face it gently 1Care for yourself in loss 1Ask and say no well 1Anger, alcohol and the body 1
Approach
Body based 2Mindfulness 1DBT skills 1
When
Under stress 2Any ordinary day 2

Tell yourself the true thing: this feeling is real, and it is temporary. No state lasts. Ride it out.

You do not have to fix it right now. You only have to outlast it. Feelings crest and fall like weather.

A minuteTolerate distressMindfulnessQur’an 93:5

Wise mind is not a calmer version of you. It is the state where what you feel and what you have thought through are both in the room, and neither has thrown the other out.

In practice it means you can feel the heat in your chest and still choose the next sentence. Neither half is the enemy: pure logic talks you out of…

A minuteTolerate distressDBT skillsQur’an 12:18

Before telling someone what you have noticed about them, ask whether they want it. Do you mind if I offer something back to you? Then describe only what you saw, plainly.

Close attention is not neutral for a person who grew up being watched for a reason. Asking first turns being observed into something they agreed to,…

A minuteTolerate distressBody basedQur’an 52:48

Say it plainly: my anger is allowed here. It is a healthy feeling and it is usually the thing telling me where a line should go.

For anyone who learned that their anger made them dangerous or unlovable, it now arrives with shame attached, and the shame is what turns it into…

A minuteTolerate distressBody basedQur’an 2:214

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.