What restoration actually looks like

It is smaller than it sounds. It is not moving on and it is not getting closure, which is a word that has done a lot of damage.

Things that count. Going back to a task that used to be theirs and is now yours. Answering one piece of post. Twenty minutes of the work you used to do. Seeing one person. Going to the masjid for one prayer. Cooking something rather than not eating. Watching something that makes you laugh.

Things that do not count, and are not asked of you anywhere in this course. Clearing their room on a schedule. Deciding what to do with their things by a date. Going back to a place because you think you ought to be able to.

The rule of thumb is that restoration is about the changed world and the ordinary day, not about the death itself.