What makes one land, and what makes one fail

It lands when it is early, when it is small, and when it does not smuggle in a point.

It fails when it arrives ninety seconds too late, after contempt has already been in the room. It fails when it is really an accusation wearing a soft voice: I am trying to be calm here, unlike some people. And it fails when it is offered and then not accepted, which is the part almost nobody talks about.

Accepting one is a skill of its own, and it is harder than making one, because accepting means letting go of the point you were about to make. Which you will have to do while still believing you were right. That is the actual cost of this, and it is worth paying.