When home is not safeStep 1 of 8

Before you read on

If you are in danger right now, stop reading. Get to a room you can leave, or to a neighbour, or call your local emergency number. Read this later. Also: this browser keeps a history, and the device you are holding may be checked. If that is a risk, use a private window, or a phone that is not yours, or a computer at a library or a clinic, and clear the history when you finish. Nothing here is scored, stored as a verdict, or shown to anyone.

Lesson 3 of 6

Why did you stay is the wrong question

It is the question everybody asks, including the person asking herself at three in the morning.

It is the wrong question, and not because it is unkind. It is wrong because it points at the person who is not doing anything. Nobody asks why he did it. The whole weight lands on the one with the least power in the house, and that is the same move the harm itself makes.

The right question is what was done to make leaving so hard. That question has answers, and they are the subject of this lesson.

Why it does not feel like harm from the inside · Inshirah