Areas › Your marriage › Answering bids
Answer one bid for closeness today that you might have let pass.
The come see this, the small touch, the story. Turn toward it, do not scroll past it.
Qur’an and Sunnah
A kind word is better than charity followed by hurt (Qur'an 2:263). Answering a small reach kindly is that kind word.
۞قَوۡلࣱ مَّعۡرُوفࣱ وَمَغۡفِرَةٌ خَيۡرࣱ مِّن صَدَقَةࣲ يَتۡبَعُهَآ أَذࣰ ىۗ وَٱللَّهُ غَنِيٌّ حَلِيمࣱ
A kind word and forgiveness is better than a charitable deed followed by hurtful [words]: God is self-sufficient, forbearing
Qur’an 2:263read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
What the research says
Love is built less in big moments than in a thousand small turns toward each other. Answering one bid today is a stitch in that fabric.
Johnson, S.M. (2019). Attachment Theory in Practice: Emotionally Focused Therapy with Individuals, Couples, and Families. Guilford
The originator's account of EFT as attachment-based practice.
Strength of evidence: research links. Replicated observational or longitudinal work.
Why it works
Turning toward bids for closeness is the daily fabric of connection.
Where this sits: EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy), attachment-based couple intervention.
This one is still a draft. It is waiting on a scholar and a clinician to read it before it is published.