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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

111 practices
Five minutes remove filterBoth of us together remove filterClear all
Area
Focus, starting, and ADHD 68Anger 21Low mood and hard feelings 11Your body 7Worry and anxiety 4
How long you have · Five minutes
A minute 36Five minutes 111Twenty minutes 76Longer 25
Who it is written for
A practitioner 109Me 68Someone I care about 46My husband or wife 26
Where you are right now
Coping, mostly 62Struggling right now 29Getting ready for something 20
On your own, or with someone · Both of us together
On my own 981Involves someone else 296Both of us together 111
Theme
Getting assessed and diagnosed 24Medication and how it works 19Feelings and focus 10Emotions as signals 7Touch and bodywork 6Reading, numbers and learning differences 5Practising under provocation 5When anger turns to harm 5What anger actually is 4Systems for daily life 3Treatment and medication 3Equanimity and perspective 3When you go numb 2Facing it a step at a time 2Growing empathy 2Obsessions and compulsions 1Righteous anger and perfectionism 1What ADHD actually is 1Screens and attention 1Shame 1Structure and routine 1The moment before you snap 1Being seen and judged 1Use your strengths 1When everything feels flat 1Grounding and settling 1
Approach
ADHD skills 38Medical and treatment 24Core 21CBT 10Emotionally focused 9Body based 4Mindfulness 2Narrative 1Trauma informed 1Parts work 1
When
Any ordinary day 63After a row 21Under stress 12Coming and going 10When apart 3In a change 2

Most people are already doing something for themselves outside your room: herbs, a chiropractor, breathing videos, a weekly massage. Ask, plainly and without a raised eyebrow.

If you treat it as fringe behaviour, you will simply stop being told about it, and then you are working half blind. You want to know what is…

Five minutesTouch and bodyworkBody basedQur’an 3:159

There comes a moment when the tissue under your fingers gives a little and allows more depth. Wait for that instead of pressing your way to it.

It sounds fanciful until you have felt it once, and then it is obvious. Rest your hand, keep the pressure steady, and let the softening decide the…

Five minutesTouch and bodyworkBody basedQur’an 4:19

Long acting does not automatically suit everybody. Some people genuinely do better on shorter doses, and it is worth saying so rather than assuming the newer option must be right.

There is a folk belief that a person's own chemistry takes over in the afternoon once the medicine wears off, and the research does not support it.…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 65:3

Medication does not make somebody care more. It narrows the distance between meaning to do the thing and doing it, and that distance is exactly what the other person has been feeling as being let down.

It helps a couple enormously to have the right name for what has been happening. The intention was real every single time. What went missing was the…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 48:17

Managing the ADHD is not the goal. Being happy together is the goal, and the ADHD work is only worth doing to the extent that it gets you there.

Keeping that order straight changes the atmosphere of the whole effort. A partner who has spent years being a project stops being one. Requests stop…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 10:57

A relationship with no friction in it can leave an ADHD partner restless rather than content. A bit of heat is not the same as a bad marriage. What matters is what happens afterwards.

Plenty of couples decide that any argument means something is broken, and then start managing each other into blandness, which nobody enjoys. The…

Five minutesUse your strengthsADHD skillsQur’an 2:148

With children, practise the hard social moment rather than explaining it. Act out asking to join a game, or losing one, a few times at home where nothing is at stake.

Keep it light and short, let them play both parts, and be the one who gets it wrong sometimes so it does not feel like a test. Pick the situation…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 20:115

When somebody says they were not scared, they just do not like being disrespected, take the dislike seriously. We dislike what threatens us, and that is why we avoid it.

The move keeps everyone's dignity intact. You are not telling a person they were frightened, you are pointing out that disliking something and being…

Five minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 70:20

If somebody insists they were not afraid of the disrespect, agree with them. Good, because if there was nothing to fear then the words were safe, and safe things can be left alone.

Whichever way the answer goes it is useful. Either the fear is now on the table, or the disrespect has just been agreed to be harmless, and the next…

Five minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 7:199

There is a difference between being afraid and being seen as afraid, and it is usually the second one people are defending. Worth asking which of the two is actually the problem.

Once somebody can say the trouble is what others would make of it, the whole reputational job anger has been doing comes into view. Often the belief…

Five minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 12:53

Certainty closes a mind and a moment of not quite following opens it again. Sometimes the most useful thing you can say is the sentence that takes a second to work out.

Ask what it would mean if somebody were not afraid of being afraid, and let the puzzle sit for a beat. In that small gap the ready made…

Five minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 21:37

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.