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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

1 practice
Shame remove filterMy husband or wife remove filterOn my own remove filterClear all
Who it is written for · My husband or wife
A practitioner 10Me 10Someone I care about 4My husband or wife 1
On your own, or with someone · On my own
Involves someone else 2Both of us together 2On my own 1
Theme · Shame
Staying regulated in conflict 36Fondness and admiration 13Answering bids 13Emotions as signals 12Feelings and focus 12Knowing your partner 10Repair after rupture 8Gratitude 7Shared spiritual life 7Choosing your response 5Treatment and medication 4What anger actually is 4The moment before you snap 3When you go numb 3Remembering to do it 3Rituals of connection 2Bringing the future closer 2Rebuilding trust 2Affection and touch 2Shame 1Listening and understanding 1Equanimity and perspective 1Systems for daily life 1The fear underneath anger 1

Shame does something cruel. It makes you want to disappear from the very person whose warmth would settle it, so if you notice yourself going quiet and pulling back, that pull is the shame talking rather than the truth about you.

Watch for the small retreats. Not answering a message, keeping an answer short, changing the subject when someone asks how you are. You do not have…

Five minutesShameEmotionally focusedQur’an 39:53

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.