Practices
Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.
Narrowed down
4 practicesHow long you have
Who it is written for · Someone I care about
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Tolerate distress
Approach · Body based
Before telling someone what you have noticed about them, ask whether they want it. Do you mind if I offer something back to you? Then describe only what you saw, plainly.
Close attention is not neutral for a person who grew up being watched for a reason. Asking first turns being observed into something they agreed to,…
Say it plainly: my anger is allowed here. It is a healthy feeling and it is usually the thing telling me where a line should go.
For anyone who learned that their anger made them dangerous or unlovable, it now arrives with shame attached, and the shame is what turns it into…
Before going towards a hard feeling, decide what will hold you while you are inside it: a way of breathing, a way of standing, a sentence, a person you can picture or ring.
Going in with nothing is not brave, it is flooding, and it teaches your system that feelings really are dangerous. Pick two or three supports in…
Anger wants the body to do something, so let it. Breathe deeper and higher into the chest, stand up, press both palms hard into a wall, walk on the spot, push down through your feet.
Pressing against something solid gives the mobilisation an outlet with nothing broken and nobody hurt. Keep going until the charge drops a little,…
Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.