Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

3 practices

Your nervous system My husband or wife Under stress Clear all

Who it is written for · My husband or wife

A practitioner 23 Someone I care about 21 Me 19 My husband or wife 3

Where you are right now

Coping, mostly 2 Struggling right now 1

Theme · Your nervous system

Staying regulated in conflict 20 Answering bids 9 Affection and touch 6 Knowing your partner 5 Choosing your response 5 Emotions as signals 5 Your nervous system 3 Listening and understanding 3 The moment before you snap 2 Feelings and focus 2 Equanimity and perspective 2 What you are actually defending 1 Repair after rupture 1 Shame 1 The fear underneath anger 1 Shared spiritual life 1

When · Under stress

Under stress 3 Any ordinary day 1

Reaching for another person when you are wound up is not a distraction from coping. Contact can turn the alarm down at the source.

This is why a short call, a message to someone who knows you, or sitting in the same room as family is worth doing before you get as far as the…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 13:28

When someone is frightened, your words may not reach them however sensible they are. Drop your voice, slow right down, and let the tone do the work.

In high alarm, hearing tips towards low rumbling sounds and away from the range the human voice sits in, so reassurance can genuinely fail to land.…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 7:205

When someone cannot take in your reassurance while they are frightened, that is the receiver and not their willingness. Wait for the wave to pass and try again.

In high arousal, hearing shifts away from the band the human voice occupies, so kind words can genuinely arrive as noise. It is easy to read that as…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 20:46

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.