Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

14 practices
How long you have · A minute
Who it is written for · Me
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Treatment and medication
Staying regulated in conflict 46The moment before you snap 39Choosing your response 36Cool the body first 33What anger actually is 25Grounding and settling 24Your nervous system 24Medication and how it works 23Bringing the future closer 22Answering bids 22Systems for daily life 22The fear underneath anger 21Get started 20Equanimity and perspective 17Fondness and admiration 15Your sense of time 15Practising under provocation 14Treatment and medication 14Knowing your partner 14Affection and touch 14Making it stick 13Repair after rupture 13Growing empathy 13Structure and routine 12Touch and bodywork 12Feelings and focus 12Food, caffeine and fuel 11Breathing 9Gratitude 9Being seen and judged 8Listening and understanding 8When everything feels flat 8Exercise, food and other supports 8What ADHD actually is 7Remembering to do it 7Tolerate distress 7Getting assessed and diagnosed 7Moving your body 7Treatment and medication 6What worry does 6What you are actually defending 6Shared spiritual life 6Rituals of connection 6Screens and attention 5Rebuilding trust 5Shame and stigma 5Posture and how you carry yourself 5Feeling from the inside 4Question the thought 4Self-compassion 4Safety and grounding 3Name what you feel 3Emotions as signals 3Patience and trust 2Obsessions and compulsions 2Shame 2Righteous anger and perfectionism 2Ride the urge 2Validate yourself and others 2Notice the pattern and flex 2Meaning after harm 2Working with anger 2Breaking the worry loop 2Your worth is not conditional 2Let the wave come 2Hold a boundary 2Facing it a step at a time 2When you use something to cope 2Calm the body 2The cost of avoiding 2Care for yourself in loss 1Help someone grieving 1When you go numb 1Get it out of your head 1Act on your values 1Panic and the body 1Ask and say no well 1Listen to the body 1Your window of tolerance 1Face it gently 1Letting it out safely 1Rest and pacing 1Anger, alcohol and the body 1Keep the bond 1
When

If something helped one part of your anxiety and did nothing for the rest, that is not proof it failed or that you are beyond help. Different parts of this run on different machinery.

The sudden bodily kind and the grinding thinking kind are handled by different systems, and a treatment that reaches one may have very little to grip…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 26:80

Nothing you take can act on something that is not there to be acted on. It is a plain limit, and it explains a good deal of the disappointment people carry about treatment.

A medicine travels everywhere in the body and only does something where there is something for it to work through. So the question is not whether a…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 41:44

Something that settles a surge of panic within minutes and something that changes how often the surges come are doing two different jobs. A person can need both, and it helps to say which is which.

The fast option is a rescue. It works quickly, it is meant for the worst moments, and its usefulness is measured in that hour. The slower option is…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 38:42

Sedatives are good at damping the body down and much less good at quieting a mind that keeps going round. If the trouble is chronic worry, being made drowsy is not the same as being helped.

This is one of the commonest mismatches there is: something sedating given for grinding worry, leaving a person tired, foggy and still worrying.…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 10:57

Sleeping tablets, sedatives, antihistamines and alcohol all pull on the same brake. Whoever is prescribing needs the whole list, including the things that do not feel like medicine.

People rarely mention a nightly drink or a sleep aid bought off the shelf, because neither feels like part of the treatment. Together they can add up…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:286

If you do not know how much of something you are taking, you cannot tell whether it is helping you. That is the honest problem with most calming products bought off the shelf, quite apart from whether the ingredient works.

Testing of these products keeps turning up contents that do not match the label, sometimes including things the label never mentions. So a good week…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:36

With anything you use to take the edge off, note what you took and when, and how you felt a few hours later. Small changes in amount can turn the same substance from calming into the opposite.

Cannabis is the clearest example. Strength and make up vary enormously between products, a small amount often settles people, and a larger amount…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

If you have been given a drug from one category for a problem in another, it is fair to ask which part of it is doing the work. Often the useful effect is a side effect that has been borrowed.

The common example is an antipsychotic given in a small dose for sleep, where the drowsiness comes from its antihistamine action rather than from…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 21:7

A small dose that has not changed in years is not automatically something to fix. Stopping carries risks of its own, and they have to be weighed rather than assumed away.

Coming off can bring withdrawal, a rebound of the original anxiety, and worse if it is done abruptly. Set against the risks of staying on, which are…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 39:53

Plenty of people carry a tablet for years and almost never take it. What it is mostly doing is reassurance, and that is worth knowing about it.

Being able to reach for it is what makes the shop or the motorway bearable, which is a real help and a quiet cost at the same time. The cost is that…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:186

How well something works in the moment and whether it is right for the long run are two separate questions. Fast relief is extremely convincing, which is exactly why it is worth pausing over.

When something reliably ends the worst feeling within twenty minutes, what your body learns is to reach for it sooner next time. That is not…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 21:84

Saying that you do not know, and then showing where you would look, beats an answer improvised on the spot. It also teaches the person asking how to check things for themselves.

Name the limit, name the source you would go to, and offer to come back with what you find. Systematic reviews and an ordinary scholarly search will…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:43

These medicines work on a timescale of four to six weeks, not days. Say the number out loud at the start, because someone expecting relief this week will have decided by Friday that it failed.

Something does happen on the first day, but it is only the first step of a change that takes weeks to finish. The useful version of this is a date:…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 20:114

There is an older antihistamine used for anxiety that works by making you drowsy and carries no risk of dependence. It suits a rough stretch, and it is a bridge rather than somewhere to settle.

The costs are the ordinary antihistamine ones: dry mouth, constipation, and for older people a genuine risk of confusion and falls, with effects on…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:184

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