Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

4 practices

Tolerate distress Five minutes Someone I care about Clear all

How long you have · Five minutes

A minute 7 Five minutes 4 Twenty minutes 2 Longer 2

Who it is written for · Someone I care about

Me 11 A practitioner 9 Someone I care about 4

Where you are right now

Coping, mostly 2 Struggling right now 1 Getting ready for something 1

On your own, or with someone

On my own 3 Involves someone else 1

Theme · Tolerate distress

Medication and how it works 71 Your nervous system 57 What anger actually is 42 Systems for daily life 39 Exercise, food and other supports 38 What ADHD actually is 36 Your sense of time 33 Equanimity and perspective 30 Grounding and settling 26 Treatment and medication 25 Moving your body 24 Screens and attention 23 What worry does 22 The fear underneath anger 22 Shame and stigma 20 The cost of avoiding 16 Breaking the worry loop 15 Bringing the future closer 15 Feelings and focus 15 Get started 15 What you are actually defending 15 Cool the body first 14 Breathing 14 Reading, numbers and learning differences 13 Structure and routine 13 The moment before you snap 12 Remembering to do it 12 Facing it a step at a time 11 Food, caffeine and fuel 10 When anger turns to harm 9 When you use something to cope 9 Making it stick 8 Righteous anger and perfectionism 8 Self-compassion 7 Growing empathy 7 Choosing your response 7 Emotions as signals 6 When everything feels flat 6 Tolerate distress 4 Shame 3 Getting assessed and diagnosed 3 Being seen and judged 3 Obsessions and compulsions 2 Anger, alcohol and the body 2 Practising under provocation 2 Feeling from the inside 1 Living with uncertainty 1 Letting it out safely 1 Use your strengths 1 Touch and bodywork 1 Help someone grieving 1 Rest and pacing 1 Question the thought 1

Approach

DBT skills 2 Body based 2

When

After a row 2 Under stress 1 Any ordinary day 1

A calming skill handed over at the wrong moment reads as your anger is not welcome here. For someone taught as a child that their anger was unacceptable, that is the old prohibition arriving again in kinder clothes.

Let the anger be seen first. Say that it makes sense, that there is a reason for it, and only then offer anything that settles the body. The order…

Five minutesTolerate distressDBT skillsQur’an 2:45

Accepting reality as it is means dropping the fight with what has already happened. It does not mean staying somewhere that is still harming you.

The two get confused often, usually by people who were told to be patient by whoever benefited from their patience. A rough test: acceptance is for…

Five minutesTolerate distressDBT skillsQur’an 39:10

Before going towards a hard feeling, decide what will hold you while you are inside it: a way of breathing, a way of standing, a sentence, a person you can picture or ring.

Going in with nothing is not brave, it is flooding, and it teaches your system that feelings really are dangerous. Pick two or three supports in…

Five minutesTolerate distressBody basedQur’an 2:153

Anger wants the body to do something, so let it. Breathe deeper and higher into the chest, stand up, press both palms hard into a wall, walk on the spot, push down through your feet.

Pressing against something solid gives the mobilisation an outlet with nothing broken and nobody hurt. Keep going until the charge drops a little,…

Five minutesTolerate distressBody basedQur’an 84:6

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.