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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

3 practices
Practising under provocation remove filterStruggling right now remove filterAfter a row remove filterClear all
How long you have
A minute 2Five minutes 1
Who it is written for
A practitioner 3Me 3Someone I care about 2My husband or wife 1
Where you are right now · Struggling right now
Coping, mostly 3Struggling right now 3
On your own, or with someone
On my own 2Involves someone else 1
Theme · Practising under provocation
What anger actually is 9Cool the body first 7Feelings and focus 5Remembering to do it 5The fear underneath anger 4Choosing your response 4Treatment and medication 4Screens and attention 3Emotions as signals 3Equanimity and perspective 3When you go numb 3Practising under provocation 3Shame and stigma 3The moment before you snap 3Tolerate distress 3What ADHD actually is 3Your nervous system 2Shame 2Making it stick 2Your sense of time 1When anger turns to harm 1Bringing the future closer 1Grounding and settling 1Getting assessed and diagnosed 1Facing it a step at a time 1Breaking the worry loop 1Growing empathy 1
When · After a row
Any ordinary day 3After a row 3Under stress 2

When you catch yourself dodging, just note it. Telling yourself off adds shame to a moment that already had plenty going on.

There is a difference between seeing what you did and grading it. Seeing keeps it available as a choice next time, while grading makes you want to…

A minutePractising under provocationCBTQur’an 16:127

Going silent and hard is not a neutral act. A fixed stare and a set brow land on the other person's body as threat, even though you have not said a word.

People often think they are being restrained when they go cold, and are then surprised by how frightened or defensive the other person becomes. If…

A minutePractising under provocationCBTQur’an 25:63

A cut heals and you stop thinking about it. An insult has no moment where the body tells you it is over, so it stays available to be replayed for years.

That is worth knowing, because it explains why a remark from a decade ago can still tighten your chest, and why you are not weak for that. The…

Five minutesPractising under provocationCBTQur’an 42:43

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.