Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

10 practices
How long you have · A minute
Who it is written for
Where you are right now · Coping, mostly
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Structure and routine
Staying regulated in conflict 46Choosing your response 25Answering bids 22The fear underneath anger 18Medication and how it works 18The moment before you snap 17Bringing the future closer 17Your nervous system 15Fondness and admiration 15Equanimity and perspective 14Knowing your partner 14Affection and touch 14Get started 13What anger actually is 13Repair after rupture 13Systems for daily life 13Your sense of time 12Cool the body first 12Growing empathy 12Treatment and medication 11Structure and routine 10Gratitude 9Grounding and settling 9Feelings and focus 8Listening and understanding 8When everything feels flat 8Moving your body 7Getting assessed and diagnosed 7Exercise, food and other supports 6Making it stick 6Remembering to do it 6Rituals of connection 6Shared spiritual life 6Touch and bodywork 6Emotions as signals 5Being seen and judged 5What you are actually defending 5Rebuilding trust 5Screens and attention 5Practising under provocation 4Food, caffeine and fuel 4Treatment and medication 4Breathing 4Shame and stigma 4Tolerate distress 4Name what you feel 3Self-compassion 3When you use something to cope 3Question the thought 3The cost of avoiding 3What worry does 3What ADHD actually is 3Safety and grounding 3Facing it a step at a time 2Patience and trust 2Meaning after harm 2Ride the urge 2Shame 2Let the wave come 2Reading, numbers and learning differences 2When anger turns to harm 2Validate yourself and others 2Hold a boundary 2Working with anger 2Your worth is not conditional 2Calm the body 2Notice the pattern and flex 2Obsessions and compulsions 2Feeling from the inside 1Panic and the body 1Face it gently 1Your window of tolerance 1Keep the bond 1Anger, alcohol and the body 1Care for yourself in loss 1Act on your values 1Listen to the body 1Ask and say no well 1Breaking the worry loop 1Righteous anger and perfectionism 1Help someone grieving 1Get it out of your head 1

Whatever you estimate, add to it. Fifteen minutes is the figure you get at midnight with empty roads; at midday the same trip takes twenty five.

Do not try to estimate better, since accurate estimating is the thing that is hard. Use a rule you can apply without judgement instead: take your…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 31:19

When you book something, put everything into the entry there and then: the address, the phone number, what you have to bring. You will never have that information more easily to hand than at the moment of booking.

The alternative is standing on the pavement at ten to one, searching for which branch it was, with the insurance card at home. Booking is already a…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 2:238

The benefit comes from how often you touch it. Writing something in is a rehearsal, looking it up is a reminder, and by the time the day arrives you have met it so many times that nothing takes you by surprise.

Which is why a scruffy system used constantly beats an elegant one opened weekly. Give yourself a couple of fixed moments to look, first thing and…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 33:35

A three o'clock appointment half an hour away is a half past two appointment. Put the true start time in and let the calendar hold it, rather than asking yourself to work it out on the day.

Lateness usually comes from anchoring on the time printed on the letter and treating the journey as though it cost nothing. Writing the leaving time…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 36:40

A child who cannot yet catch their own drifting needs somebody close enough to catch it for them. Where they sit does a lot of that work quietly.

From nearby a teacher sees attention go before the work is lost, and can bring the child back without stopping the lesson for everyone. Proximity…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 24:36

Bring a child back with the smallest signal that does the job. A tap on the desk, a hand on the shoulder, or simply standing beside them will usually be enough.

Say a child's name across a room and everyone turns to look. Do that twenty times a day and the child learns something about themselves in front of…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 31:19

Get the child's eyes first, then give one instruction. The page, how much, and by when, and then stop.

An instruction thrown at a busy room never reaches the child who most needs it, so the name and the eye contact come before any content at all. Then…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 73:4

The long reason why is doing less than you hope. Give the instruction, give one short line of why if it helps, and let that be the end of it.

When the explanation runs on, the instruction gets buried somewhere in the middle of it and comes out the other side lost. A long justification also…

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 17:110

Attach a new habit to one you already do: after wudu, I read one page.

Let an existing routine carry the new thing. You are borrowing momentum you already have.

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 31:19

Do the task at the same time and place each day, so the setting starts to do the reminding.

Novelty costs a mind like yours energy. Sameness of time and place buys that energy back.

A minuteStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 87:8

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.