If it is heavier than that

If you have thoughts of ending your life, or of harming yourself, treat that as urgent rather than as part of this pattern. Tell somebody today. A doctor, an emergency service, or someone who is in the room with you.

If any part of the picture in lesson one is happening now, the confusion, the not sleeping at all without feeling tired, the beliefs about the baby that other people say are not true, that is emergency services now and someone stays with you and the baby.

Neither of those is a failure of anything. They are reasons to get help quickly rather than slowly.