Areas › Focus, starting, and ADHD › What ADHD actually is
Set jobs at the level the child can manage now, then build up. A task pitched at their age that ends in a row every week mainly teaches them they are hopeless at chores.
Break it down further than feels necessary: not tidy your room, but put the clothes in the basket. Stay nearby for the first few goes, since being in the room works better than reminders called from another one. Once it has run smoothly for a couple of weeks, add the next piece.
Qur’an and Sunnah
We have assigned a law and a path to each of you (Quran 5:48). Different paths towards the same good is the frame, which is roughly what pitching a job to the child in front of you amounts to.
وَأَنزَلۡنَآ إِلَيۡكَ ٱلۡكِتَٰبَ بِٱلۡحَقِّ مُصَدِّقࣰ ا لِّمَا بَيۡنَ يَدَيۡهِ مِنَ ٱلۡكِتَٰبِ وَمُهَيۡمِنًا عَلَيۡهِۖ فَٱحۡكُم بَيۡنَهُم بِمَآ أَنزَلَ ٱللَّهُۖ وَلَا تَتَّبِعۡ أَهۡوَآءَهُمۡ عَمَّا جَآءَكَ مِنَ ٱلۡحَقِّۚ لِكُلࣲّ جَعَلۡنَا مِنكُمۡ شِرۡعَةࣰ وَمِنۡهَاجࣰ اۚ وَلَوۡ شَآءَ ٱللَّهُ لَجَعَلَكُمۡ أُمَّةࣰ وَٰحِدَةࣰ وَلَٰكِن لِّيَبۡلُوَكُمۡ فِي مَآ ءَاتَىٰكُمۡۖ فَٱسۡتَبِقُواْ ٱلۡخَيۡرَٰتِۚ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ مَرۡجِعُكُمۡ جَمِيعࣰ ا فَيُنَبِّئُكُم بِمَا كُنتُمۡ فِيهِ تَخۡتَلِفُونَ
We sent to you [Muhammad] the Scripture with the truth, confirming the Scriptures that came before it, and with final authority over them: so judge between them according to what God has sent down. Do not follow their whims, which deviate from the truth that has come to you. We have assigned a law and a path to each of you. If God had so willed, He would have made you one community, but He wanted to test you through that which He has given you, so race to do good: you will all return to God and He will make clear to you the matters you differed about
Qur’an 5:48read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
What the research says
A six month double blind trial in 410 adults tested whether treatment changed everyday functioning rather than symptom scores alone. The wider point carries over: the measure that matters is whether daily life works, and that is the same yardstick for a chore list. It is a medication trial, so it says nothing directly about how to set chores.
Adler LA, Spencer TJ, Levine LR, Ramsey JL, Tamura R, Kelsey D, Ball SG, Allen AJ, Biederman J. (2008). Functional outcomes in the treatment of adults with ADHD.. Journal of attention disorders doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
Why it works
Tasks slightly inside what someone can manage build competence, while tasks above it simply repeat failure.
This one is still a draft. It is waiting on a scholar and a clinician to read it before it is published.
Near this one
The first year away at university takes away nearly every bit of structure at once and asks a young person to build their own. It is one of the commonest points at which ADHD finally shows itself.
If things fell apart when your routine did, that is information rather than a character flaw. A great deal of what was holding you together was built into the day around you.
Plenty of adults with ADHD keep tripping over rules nobody ever stated: how long a turn in a conversation lasts, when a story has gone on too long, when a joke reads differently than you meant it.