Practices

Classes and clubs work mostly because somebody notices when you are not there. It is the being expected, more than the workout, that gets you out of the door.

A running club, a swimming group, a friend at the gate at seven. On the evening when you feel like nothing, an arrangement with another person…

Moving your body and being with people you like are the two most reliable things for feeling well. Doing both at once is not a trick, it is just efficient.

Each of them changes how you feel through the body, and neither depends on you having a good week. A walk with a friend gets you both. If you can…

Before sending anyone for hands on work, ask what touch has meant in their life. A massage table is a poor place to discover that touch brings something back.

The person delivering it is not there to hold what surfaces, and often has no training for it. So ask directly, ask about what parts of the body are…

If several medications have failed, ask whether anyone else in the family had the same experience. A pattern of non response runs in some families.

It is a question that rarely gets asked and can save a year. If a parent or sibling went through the same list without success and then responded to…

Telling someone what a treatment will actually be like improves how they respond to it. What it feels like, how long, what is normal afterwards.

Uncertainty makes everything sharper, so filling it in with plain description takes some of the edge off before anything starts. Do not oversell it…

Lead with what has evidence behind it. Save the thinly supported options for when the person brings them up themselves.

Mentioning something is a form of recommending it, whatever hedges you attach, and families will spend money and hope accordingly. If they raise it,…

Regular massage has been studied with restless, distractible children and teenagers, and their teachers noticed the difference in class as well as the young people noticing it in themselves.

The pattern in these studies is modest and repeated: short sessions, twice a week, over several weeks, with mood and behaviour improving rather than…

In placebo studies, people improve even when they have been told outright that the pill is inert. They also usually spend half an hour talking with someone who is paying attention.

That half hour is easy to dismiss as a detail of the study design, and it may be most of the treatment. Which is oddly encouraging: careful listening…