Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

20 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for · Me
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone · On my own
Theme · Treatment and medication
Your nervous system 105Medication and how it works 82What anger actually is 78The moment before you snap 76Choosing your response 73Get started 65Systems for daily life 62Grounding and settling 59Equanimity and perspective 57The fear underneath anger 56Cool the body first 55Your sense of time 52Touch and bodywork 52Food, caffeine and fuel 49Moving your body 48Bringing the future closer 46What ADHD actually is 42Exercise, food and other supports 41When everything feels flat 39Feelings and focus 37Staying regulated in conflict 36Practising under provocation 36Shame and stigma 30Making it stick 29Treatment and medication 29Getting assessed and diagnosed 28Screens and attention 28Breathing 28Structure and routine 24Feeling from the inside 23Tolerate distress 23Being seen and judged 22What worry does 21What you are actually defending 21Treatment and medication 20Growing empathy 20Remembering to do it 20When you use something to cope 18Answering bids 13Fondness and admiration 13Breaking the worry loop 13Emotions as signals 12Obsessions and compulsions 12Righteous anger and perfectionism 12Self-compassion 12Question the thought 11Knowing your partner 10Facing it a step at a time 10Shame 10Use your strengths 9Repair after rupture 8Posture and how you carry yourself 8Anger, alcohol and the body 8Gratitude 7Shared spiritual life 7When anger turns to harm 5Letting it out safely 4Meaning after harm 4When you go numb 4Living with uncertainty 4Act on your values 3Rebuilding trust 3Rest and pacing 3Safety and grounding 3Let the wave come 3Working with anger 3Your worth is not conditional 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Calm the body 3Name what you feel 3Work with your brain 2Ride the urge 2Get it out of your head 2Your window of tolerance 2Hold a boundary 2Find meaning 2Patience and trust 2Affection and touch 2Face it gently 2Keep the bond 2Reading, numbers and learning differences 2Listen to the body 2Rituals of connection 2Care for yourself in loss 2Listening and understanding 1Panic and the body 1Validate yourself and others 1The cost of avoiding 1
When

If something helped one part of your anxiety and did nothing for the rest, that is not proof it failed or that you are beyond help. Different parts of this run on different machinery.

The sudden bodily kind and the grinding thinking kind are handled by different systems, and a treatment that reaches one may have very little to grip…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 26:80

Nothing you take can act on something that is not there to be acted on. It is a plain limit, and it explains a good deal of the disappointment people carry about treatment.

A medicine travels everywhere in the body and only does something where there is something for it to work through. So the question is not whether a…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 41:44

Something that settles a surge of panic within minutes and something that changes how often the surges come are doing two different jobs. A person can need both, and it helps to say which is which.

The fast option is a rescue. It works quickly, it is meant for the worst moments, and its usefulness is measured in that hour. The slower option is…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 38:42

Sedatives are good at damping the body down and much less good at quieting a mind that keeps going round. If the trouble is chronic worry, being made drowsy is not the same as being helped.

This is one of the commonest mismatches there is: something sedating given for grinding worry, leaving a person tired, foggy and still worrying.…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 10:57

If you do not know how much of something you are taking, you cannot tell whether it is helping you. That is the honest problem with most calming products bought off the shelf, quite apart from whether the ingredient works.

Testing of these products keeps turning up contents that do not match the label, sometimes including things the label never mentions. So a good week…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:36

With anything you use to take the edge off, note what you took and when, and how you felt a few hours later. Small changes in amount can turn the same substance from calming into the opposite.

Cannabis is the clearest example. Strength and make up vary enormously between products, a small amount often settles people, and a larger amount…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

A small dose that has not changed in years is not automatically something to fix. Stopping carries risks of its own, and they have to be weighed rather than assumed away.

Coming off can bring withdrawal, a rebound of the original anxiety, and worse if it is done abruptly. Set against the risks of staying on, which are…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 39:53

Plenty of people carry a tablet for years and almost never take it. What it is mostly doing is reassurance, and that is worth knowing about it.

Being able to reach for it is what makes the shop or the motorway bearable, which is a real help and a quiet cost at the same time. The cost is that…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:186

How well something works in the moment and whether it is right for the long run are two separate questions. Fast relief is extremely convincing, which is exactly why it is worth pausing over.

When something reliably ends the worst feeling within twenty minutes, what your body learns is to reach for it sooner next time. That is not…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 21:84

There is an older antihistamine used for anxiety that works by making you drowsy and carries no risk of dependence. It suits a rough stretch, and it is a bridge rather than somewhere to settle.

The costs are the ordinary antihistamine ones: dry mouth, constipation, and for older people a genuine risk of confusion and falls, with effects on…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:184

Ask what symptom you are aiming at rather than what the diagnosis is called. Nothing anyone takes recognises a category; it acts on whatever is happening in the body.

In practice that means naming the target out loud before anything is started or changed: the surges that come from nowhere, the sleeplessness, the…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 39:9

Anxiety comes in two rough families. Fear is the sudden bodily kind that arrives in a rush, and worry is the slow kind that circles and will not settle.

The distinction earns its place because the two behave differently. Fear peaks and passes and shows up in the heart and the breath, while worry sits…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 20:114

Most people are a mixture rather than a clean example of one thing. If treatment has taken the edge off one part and left another standing, that is usually two problems, not one failure.

Someone whose panic has settled but who still spends every evening rehearsing tomorrow has had the fear part treated and the worry part left alone.…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 94:5

When what is keeping you awake or on edge is your situation, a tablet can only do so much. That is not a failure of the medicine and it is certainly not a failure of you.

Noise, an unsafe home, night shifts, someone you are frightened of: none of these are altered by anything you swallow. The medicine may still be…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 65:7

Physical dependence on a sedative can build while you are taking it exactly as prescribed. Nothing has gone wrong with you and nobody has misused anything.

Regulators strengthened the warnings across this whole class of medicines to say so plainly, including that withdrawal can be drawn out. Knowing it…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 24:61

The number worth watching is not the dose but the direction. A dose that keeps creeping upward says something that a steady one does not.

You are often the person who sees this, because you hear about it in passing across months while the prescriber sees someone twice a year. Note it…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 42:38

Before choosing what to try, work out which kind of anxiety you are dealing with. What settles a sudden surge and what wears down months of low grade worry are rarely the same thing.

For the surging kind, the things that help act fast and work on the body. For the worrying kind, they are slower and work on how the days are built:…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 38:41

The first week or so on one of these can feel worse rather than better: jittery, restless, sleeping badly. For most people it settles within a fortnight, and it is a known part of starting rather than a sign of harm.

Untold, a person quite reasonably concludes the medicine is making them ill and stops. Told beforehand, the same week becomes something to sit out,…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 94:5

Some anxiety medicines have no fast setting at all. They work on the receiving side of the system and take two to four weeks to show anything, so taking one in a bad moment does nothing and proves nothing.

For the right person the trade is a good one: nothing to become dependent on, no withdrawal, no dangerous mixing with alcohol, and nothing to reach…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

Take a few photographs of your bedroom, then look at them later and circle whatever has to change or go. Seeing the room in a picture shows you things you stopped noticing years ago while standing in it.

The list is usually short and dull: the light on a charger, the pile of unfinished things on the chair, the television, the clock you keep checking.…

Twenty minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 13:11

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.