Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

43 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone · On my own
Theme · Treatment and medication
Your nervous system 108What anger actually is 83Medication and how it works 83The moment before you snap 76Choosing your response 73Get started 65Systems for daily life 62Grounding and settling 60Equanimity and perspective 57The fear underneath anger 57Cool the body first 55Your sense of time 52Touch and bodywork 52Food, caffeine and fuel 49What ADHD actually is 49Moving your body 48Bringing the future closer 46When everything feels flat 44Exercise, food and other supports 44Treatment and medication 43Getting assessed and diagnosed 42Feelings and focus 38Practising under provocation 36Staying regulated in conflict 36Screens and attention 31Shame and stigma 30Making it stick 29Breathing 28Structure and routine 25Treatment and medication 24What worry does 24Feeling from the inside 23Tolerate distress 23Being seen and judged 22What you are actually defending 21Remembering to do it 20Growing empathy 20When you use something to cope 19Reading, numbers and learning differences 14Breaking the worry loop 13Answering bids 13Righteous anger and perfectionism 13Obsessions and compulsions 13Fondness and admiration 13Self-compassion 12Emotions as signals 12Question the thought 11Facing it a step at a time 11Shame 10Knowing your partner 10Use your strengths 9Anger, alcohol and the body 8Posture and how you carry yourself 8Repair after rupture 8Shared spiritual life 7Gratitude 7When anger turns to harm 7Meaning after harm 4Letting it out safely 4When you go numb 4Living with uncertainty 4Calm the body 3Safety and grounding 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Name what you feel 3Act on your values 3Let the wave come 3Your worth is not conditional 3Working with anger 3Rest and pacing 3Rebuilding trust 3Affection and touch 2Your window of tolerance 2Rituals of connection 2Ride the urge 2Patience and trust 2Panic and the body 2Listen to the body 2The cost of avoiding 2Work with your brain 2Keep the bond 2Hold a boundary 2Get it out of your head 2Find meaning 2Face it gently 2Care for yourself in loss 2Listening and understanding 1Validate yourself and others 1
Approach
When

If someone selling you a treatment for ADHD uses the word cure, that is your cue to leave. There is no cure. What good treatment offers is fewer symptoms, and that is a real and worthwhile thing.

A registered clinician is not allowed to promise you an outcome, because nobody can honestly guarantee one. So a provider who promises makes you a…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 26:80

ADHD is managed rather than cured, across a whole life. Anything advertising a cure is telling you it is not working from the evidence.

Managed sounds like a disappointment until you look at what it means in practice: treatment that fits your life now, adjusted when the life changes,…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:286

Listen for the sentence that says the child could manage all of this perfectly well if they only decided to. However kindly it is meant, that is the belief to take apart.

It sounds like encouragement and it works like a verdict, because it says the ability was always there and only the willingness was missing. In a…

A minuteTreatment and medicationADHD skillsQur’an 49:6

If mindfulness is going to help with ADHD, the version with a chance is small and spread out. A few seconds of noticing, several times a day, rather than one long sitting you come to dread.

A forty five minute block asks you to get settled in one place and then somehow carry that into the afternoon, and the carrying is exactly what tends…

A minuteTreatment and medicationCBTQur’an 22:78

By response rate, extended release stimulants are among the most effective medicines in psychiatry, and most people tolerate them well. That is worth hearing plainly, particularly from people who are not generally keen on medication.

What the long acting form buys you is coverage. A dose that has faded by four in the afternoon leaves the evening bare, and the evening is where home…

A minuteTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 26:80

Three things are worth noticing before you buy any treatment: whether the only research on it is their own, whether they will say plainly what it is meant to change, and whether you have to sign something.

Each one covers a different way of being caught out. Research a company funded and ran itself has never been checked by anyone with nothing to lose.…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 4:29

Better usually means smaller, rarer, or shorter. Pick something you can count, like losing your keys twice a week instead of every day.

Vague goals cannot be reviewed, so a few months later nobody can say whether anything changed and you are left going on mood alone. Choose two or…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 65:3

You are going to look things up anyway, so start somewhere with proper review behind it. CHADD and Understood both have professionals checking what goes on the page.

Telling anyone to stop searching online has never worked and only means they search without saying so. Better to hand over two or three places worth…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:43

Part of why so many adults are coming forward now is that well known people have said out loud that they have this. Seeing someone capable say it makes the asking cost less.

The old picture of ADHD was a careless child and a lazy adult, and that picture kept a great many people from ever mentioning it. An athlete at the…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 24:61

Brain training and therapeutic games raise one question above all others. Does the improvement show up anywhere except inside the game, and does it last once you stop playing?

People do get better at what they practise, and the scores go up, which makes for a persuasive chart on a website. The harder question is whether…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 13:11

Supplements are not checked before they go on sale, so what is in the bottle may not match the label. Look for a third party mark such as USP or NSF before you buy.

This is not about whether a given supplement helps. It is about the plainer question of whether you are getting the dose written on the front, since…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:195

CBT has more research behind it than most other therapies, and part of that is because it is easy to count. Its steps and its outcomes can be scored, so it gets studied more often.

That is worth saying because a thin research base is not the same as a therapy that fails. Approaches that work through relationship, imagery or the…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 39:9

Two things happening together is not one causing the other. Learn that once and you have a reply to most of the claims you will meet.

Children with ADHD may use more screens, and screens may not be the reason. The same shape turns up with sugar, with additives, with organic food and…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:36

The point of treatment is not a tidier score on a questionnaire. It is fewer accidents, a finished course, work that holds, relationships that survive, a longer and better life.

Symptoms are worth reducing because of what they do downstream, and that is where the goal should be set. It changes what you review, too. Instead of…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationADHD skillsQur’an 9:105

After a working lifetime in this field, Barkley names the change in how a family sees the child as the most important step of all. Not the medication, not the charts.

The reason is practical rather than sentimental. Every other part of treatment asks parents to keep going for weeks with very little to show for it,…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationADHD skillsQur’an 13:11

Being told ADHD is largely inherited can sound like being told nothing can be done. It does not follow, and the two questions are separate ones.

How much of something a person shows, day to day, moves a good deal with what is around them, even when the underlying trait is strongly heritable.…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationADHD skillsQur’an 12:87

A child can be almost trouble free with a grandparent who has all afternoon for them, and impossible in a class of twenty five. Same child, same condition, very different demand.

What a setting asks for is the ratio between the self control a person has to supply and the structure being supplied for them. One adult, close…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationADHD skillsQur’an 94:5

Untreated ADHD is not free. It turns up in appointments, in repeat trips to A and E, in school reports and in lost work, and the bill lands on the family either way.

So when the cost of treatment is the reason for waiting, it is worth adding up what is already going out, in money and in hours and in the things…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 4:28

Gathering disruptive children into one room to learn social skills leaves about a quarter of them worse than before. They pick things up from each other far faster than from the adult at the front.

This is not a reason to give up on helping a child socially. It is a reason to look hard at who else is in the group before you accept a place in it.…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationCoreQur’an 2:195

The warning about group social skills work is about loud, disruptive children. A quiet, anxious child who simply has not had much practice with other children is a different case, and a gentle group may be exactly right.

So the question is not whether groups work, but which child is sitting in front of you. If the difficulty really is inexperience, a group offers…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationCoreQur’an 49:6

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.