Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

69 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now · Coping, mostly
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Systems for daily life
Medication and how it works 97Systems for daily life 69Getting assessed and diagnosed 54Get started 47Your nervous system 47Moving your body 43Exercise, food and other supports 40Treatment and medication 39Your sense of time 37What anger actually is 37Bringing the future closer 36Touch and bodywork 30What ADHD actually is 28Equanimity and perspective 26Screens and attention 26Growing empathy 25Structure and routine 25The moment before you snap 25When everything feels flat 25Choosing your response 24Food, caffeine and fuel 23Feelings and focus 23What worry does 22Grounding and settling 21Knowing your partner 20Treatment and medication 20The fear underneath anger 20The cost of avoiding 19Breathing 18Shared spiritual life 16Being seen and judged 16Practising under provocation 15Making it stick 15Fondness and admiration 14Breaking the worry loop 14Shame and stigma 13Righteous anger and perfectionism 13What you are actually defending 13Remembering to do it 13Answering bids 12Staying regulated in conflict 11Emotions as signals 10Listening and understanding 10When you use something to cope 10Feeling from the inside 10Reading, numbers and learning differences 10Gratitude 9Use your strengths 7Rituals of connection 7Affection and touch 7Cool the body first 6Self-compassion 6When anger turns to harm 6Tolerate distress 5Anger, alcohol and the body 5Facing it a step at a time 5Rebuilding trust 5Obsessions and compulsions 5Posture and how you carry yourself 4Repair after rupture 3Question the thought 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Your worth is not conditional 3Panic and the body 3Meaning after harm 2Work with your brain 2Keep the bond 2Get it out of your head 2Find meaning 2Act on your values 2Face it gently 2Rest and pacing 2Listen to the body 1Safety and grounding 1Care for yourself in loss 1Living with uncertainty 1When you go numb 1Your window of tolerance 1Shame 1
Approach
When · Any ordinary day

Charge the phone in another room overnight. Not face down, not on the far side of the bed: another room, so that reaching it means standing up.

Distance is what does the work here, which is why the halfway versions never hold. If you use it as an alarm, a cheap clock settles that for the…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeMedical and treatmentQur’an 65:3

Praise the sitting down at the desk, not only the finished piece. If recognition only shows up when something is completed, most weeks it never shows up at all.

Say what you actually saw, and say it close to the moment: you sat down twice today when you clearly did not want to. Small rewards work too, as long…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 34:11

Use a timer you can see rather than one you have to read. A dial where the coloured part shrinks tells you how much is left at a glance, with no arithmetic in the way.

Set it for the length of the task, or for the length you can stand, and leave it where your eye falls. A digital countdown asks you to work out what…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 27:40

When a young person tells you something in their own blunt words, meet them there. Laughing together buys more trust than a well judged correction ever will.

Correct the language and you sort yourself into the same bin as every other disappointed adult, and after that the useful information stops arriving.…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 3:159

When something has sat undone for weeks, ask what next month's version of you would say about it. Relieved it is finished, or honestly indifferent?

If future you would be relieved, this is procrastination and it needs a hand: a smaller first step, a set time, someone alongside you. If future you…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 12:48

An hour exists somewhere in the week for almost anything. That is what makes yes so easy, and it is not the same as having an hour.

The question that gets skipped is not whether the time exists but what is already claiming it. Answering that means calling to mind everything you…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 17:29

Practise one sentence until it comes out on its own: let me check and come back to you. It buys the few minutes you need to answer truthfully.

The moment of being asked is the hard part, because the yes is out of your mouth before any checking has happened. Having one phrase ready means you…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 20:114

Put the uncertainty at the front. Not Thursday, possibly Friday, most likely Monday is worth far more to the other person than a confident yes you cannot keep.

It feels worse to say, which is why people avoid it. But a hedge given early costs you nothing, while a promise broken later costs twice: the thing…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 25:67

The cheapest place to deal with a task is before it ever reaches your list. Some things are better declined in the moment they are offered.

Once something is written down it starts costing you. It gets read, moved to next week, copied out again, felt guilty about. Filtering at the door…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 7:31

Score each target from one to five rather than done or not done, and have the teacher say a word about it and initial the sheet before the child leaves the room.

Half the work finished earns a three. That matters enormously for a child whose usual score would be nothing at all, because a pass or fail sheet…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 84:19

Let the child score themselves on the same sheet the teacher scores. Two columns, filled in separately, then looked at together.

At first the two columns can be miles apart, and that is the useful bit rather than a problem. Nobody is being caught out. Over the weeks the gap…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 10:61

Before anything else, check the child actually knows what the homework is. Most homework goes missing at that first step, not at the effort step.

It might be on the board, on the school portal or in the planner with the teacher having glanced at it, and any of those is fine as long as it can be…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 20:114

Print the agreement out and stick it up where the child will see it. In a drawer it may as well not exist.

The moment that matters is the one where the console is right there and the maths is not started, and nothing you agreed a fortnight ago is in the…

A minuteSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 68:1

Before a task you have been circling for days, give five minutes to moving your body. A brisk walk or a couple of flights of stairs is often enough to make starting feel less like pushing at a door that will not open.

Treat the movement as part of the task rather than something virtuous you do separately. The lift is short lived, so it helps most sitting right…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeMedical and treatmentQur’an 20:114

Light movement while you work is not stolen from the work. Rocking a foot, standing up, a slow circuit of the room on a call: for many people the concentration goes up rather than down.

Worth testing instead of assuming. Take one task you always do sitting still and do it moving gently: read on your feet, take the meeting walking,…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeMedical and treatmentQur’an 22:78

Do not leave it to eleven at night to decide whether to close the tab. Set the block in the afternoon, while you are still the version of yourself who wants it set.

A browser extension that shuts certain sites between certain hours, a router on a timer, mobile data off after a set time. Pick one, set it once, and…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeMedical and treatmentQur’an 34:11

Good help leaves you more able to do it yourself next time. If the whole thing only works while the other person is in the room, something has gone sideways.

There is a real difference between someone building your schedule for you and someone sitting beside you while you build it. The second is slower and…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 18:95

Some people genuinely do not feel time passing. There is now, and there is not now, and the hour in between goes missing. That is a difference in perception rather than a comment on how much someone cares.

Worth saying plainly in a family where lateness has turned into a moral argument. A person who is never on time may be honestly surprised each…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 2:189

Planning does not really happen in your head. Until the week is written somewhere you actually look, you are guessing, however sincere your intentions are.

One calendar rather than four. Paper or phone matters far less than whether you will open it, so choose the one that appears in front of you without…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 68:1

Urgent means the clock is pushing. Important means it matters to the life you are trying to have. In the moment the two feel identical, and they are not.

Take your list and put one letter beside each thing. U if something real goes wrong today when it slips, I if it moves you towards something you care…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 25:67

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.