Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

13 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now · Coping, mostly
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Shame and stigma
Medication and how it works 97Systems for daily life 69Getting assessed and diagnosed 54Your nervous system 47Get started 47Moving your body 43Exercise, food and other supports 40Treatment and medication 39What anger actually is 37Your sense of time 37Bringing the future closer 36Touch and bodywork 30What ADHD actually is 28Equanimity and perspective 26Screens and attention 26Growing empathy 25When everything feels flat 25The moment before you snap 25Structure and routine 25Choosing your response 24Food, caffeine and fuel 23Feelings and focus 23What worry does 22Grounding and settling 21The fear underneath anger 20Treatment and medication 20Knowing your partner 20The cost of avoiding 19Breathing 18Shared spiritual life 16Being seen and judged 16Practising under provocation 15Making it stick 15Fondness and admiration 14Breaking the worry loop 14Shame and stigma 13What you are actually defending 13Righteous anger and perfectionism 13Remembering to do it 13Answering bids 12Staying regulated in conflict 11When you use something to cope 10Listening and understanding 10Reading, numbers and learning differences 10Emotions as signals 10Feeling from the inside 10Gratitude 9Use your strengths 7Rituals of connection 7Affection and touch 7Self-compassion 6Cool the body first 6When anger turns to harm 6Rebuilding trust 5Obsessions and compulsions 5Tolerate distress 5Facing it a step at a time 5Anger, alcohol and the body 5Posture and how you carry yourself 4Repair after rupture 3Panic and the body 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Your worth is not conditional 3Question the thought 3Face it gently 2Act on your values 2Meaning after harm 2Keep the bond 2Get it out of your head 2Work with your brain 2Find meaning 2Rest and pacing 2Living with uncertainty 1When you go numb 1Shame 1Care for yourself in loss 1Safety and grounding 1Listen to the body 1Your window of tolerance 1
When · Any ordinary day

ADD and ADHD are not two different things. ADD is the older public word for what is now called ADHD, inattentive type, and the quieter presentation is not a lighter version of it.

The mix up matters more than it sounds. Parents sometimes hear ADD and take it to mean something mild that will not need treatment, and school or…

A minuteShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 33:5

Manuals rename things. Paediatric bipolar became disruptive mood dysregulation disorder, whole categories were reshuffled to line up with the international classification, and none of it changed who anybody was.

If you have old paperwork carrying a label nobody uses now, that is bookkeeping rather than a hidden verdict on you. What is worth your attention is…

A minuteShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 17:84

Talking a lot is on the diagnostic list. It sits with the impulsive symptoms, which makes it part of the condition rather than proof that you are self absorbed.

That reframe is worth having, because most people who do this have been told off for it for years and have drawn an unkind conclusion about…

A minuteShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 48:17

ADHD now sits with the neurodevelopmental conditions in the diagnostic manual rather than under disorders that begin in childhood. That move carries a claim worth hearing: this is about how a brain is built, and it does not stop at eighteen.

The older category quietly implied something you would grow out of, and plenty of adults were told exactly that. Shifting it means the evidence for a…

Five minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 95:4

If your version of this is fog, slowness and drifting off rather than restlessness, you are not a half case. Researchers are still arguing about whether that pattern is a subtype or something of its own.

The quiet presentation gets noticed late, because it disturbs nobody. It seems to sit alongside a different set of difficulties too, more inward than…

Five minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 92:4

The feeling that everyone else was handed a manual on how to be with people has a plain explanation. Most social rules are picked up by watching, and watching steadily is the hard part for you.

So the gaps are real rather than imagined, and they are gaps in information, not in worth. That is oddly good news, because information can be taught…

Five minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 2:148

By the time somebody comes for an assessment, the poor opinion of themselves is usually decades old. Assume it is there even when the person in front of you is visibly doing well.

It rarely arrives as a complaint. It shows up as apologising for taking up your time, as brushing off achievements, as a joke about being useless…

Five minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 6:54

The famous ADHD success stories are real and they are also the exception. The commoner story, for someone whose difficulty was never identified, is quietly dropping out of things and disappearing.

Both halves need saying. Strengths talk that only features the founder who made millions can turn an ordinary struggling week into a personal failure…

Five minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 12:87

Everyone is late sometimes and everyone gets forgiven for it. The catch is that the ordinary allowance runs on how often rather than how badly, and yours tends to be spent early in the month.

This is why behaviour people shrugged at last year gets a sharp response now, without anything about you having changed. Worth knowing, because the…

Five minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 24:22

With children, acting a situation out teaches far more than talking about it. Play the scene, swap roles, get it wrong, do it again.

Explaining social rules to a child who missed them leans on the same steady attention that let them slip past in the first place. Rehearsal skips…

Twenty minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 2:83

Achievement does not cancel an old belief that you are a failure. People reach the very thing they were sure would fix it, feel nothing change, and quietly conclude that the problem must be them after all.

The belief was not built out of results, so results do not dismantle it. Anything good gets reattributed on the way in: luck, timing, other people…

Twenty minutesShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 49:13

The parts of this that look like lifestyle, meaning sleep, driving, drinking, appointments that get missed, are the parts carrying the most risk across a lifetime. They are also the most changeable parts.

You may have met a striking figure quoted about untreated ADHD and years of life lost. Take the point underneath rather than the number: risk from…

LongerShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 17:70

Getting your ordinary life a bit calmer is worth doing for its own sake. More sleep, a little more structure, food that is not all improvised. Not perfect, just good enough to work with.

It will not give you more capacity than you have. What it does is let you use more of what you already have, more of the time, which is usually the…

LongerShame and stigmaADHD skillsQur’an 3:135

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.