Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

5 practices

Rebuilding trust Any ordinary day Clear all

How long you have

A minute 2 Five minutes 1 Twenty minutes 2

Who it is written for

Me 5 My husband or wife 5

On your own, or with someone

Involves someone else 4 On my own 1

Theme · Rebuilding trust

Medication and how it works 148Systems for daily life 90 Your nervous system 87 Get started 69 Getting assessed and diagnosed 64 Your sense of time 58 What anger actually is 58 Moving your body 56 Exercise, food and other supports 55 Food, caffeine and fuel 53 The moment before you snap 49 Treatment and medication 48 What ADHD actually is 48 Bringing the future closer 46 Choosing your response 45 Screens and attention 44 Touch and bodywork 38 Equanimity and perspective 37 Grounding and settling 34 When everything feels flat 34 Structure and routine 33 Feelings and focus 32 The fear underneath anger 31 Reading, numbers and learning differences 31 Practising under provocation 30 Growing empathy 29 What worry does 26 Shame and stigma 25 Cool the body first 25 Being seen and judged 24 Breathing 24 Making it stick 24 The cost of avoiding 24 Treatment and medication 23 Remembering to do it 20 Knowing your partner 20 When you use something to cope 19 Feeling from the inside 16 Facing it a step at a time 16 Shared spiritual life 16 Breaking the worry loop 16 What you are actually defending 14 Fondness and admiration 14 Emotions as signals 13 Obsessions and compulsions 13 Righteous anger and perfectionism 13 Answering bids 12 Tolerate distress 12 Staying regulated in conflict 11 Listening and understanding 10 Gratitude 9 Posture and how you carry yourself 9 Use your strengths 8 Self-compassion 8 Affection and touch 7 Shame 7 Rituals of connection 7 Anger, alcohol and the body 6 When anger turns to harm 6 Question the thought 6 Rebuilding trust 5 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Rest and pacing 3 When you go numb 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Panic and the body 3 Repair after rupture 3 Living with uncertainty 3 Work with your brain 2 Find meaning 2 Act on your values 2 Face it gently 2 Keep the bond 2 Meaning after harm 2 Get it out of your head 2 Your window of tolerance 1 Safety and grounding 1 Listen to the body 1 Care for yourself in loss 1

When · Any ordinary day

After a row 9 Any ordinary day 5 Under stress 2 Coming and going 1

Deliberately hold your partner's good qualities in mind, and let cherishing crowd out resentful thoughts.

After trust is rebuilding, nurture cherishing: recall and dwell on what you value in them, on purpose.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 25:74

Rebuild the small rituals of connection that eroded: predictable, reliable moments you can both count on.

Betrayal usually follows the quiet loss of daily connection. Restore steady rituals you can rely on to reconnect.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 70:23

Do not try to restore the old marriage. Build a new one, on honesty, transparency, and witnessing each other's truths.

The relationship before cannot be recovered as it was. Aim instead for a second marriage, to the same person, on firmer ground.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 30:21

Atonement is not only apology; it is changed behavior over time. Let your actions become the apology.

Words open the door; sustained new behavior walks through it. Trust returns through consistency, not speeches.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 25:70

Let the hurt partner set the pace of healing. It takes as long as it takes; there is no rushing trust back.

You cannot demand that trust return on a schedule. Honor the injured partner's timeline without pressure.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 2:286

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.