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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

14 practices
Affection and touch remove filterA minute remove filterCoping, mostly remove filterClear all
How long you have · A minute
A minute 14Five minutes 1
Who it is written for
Me 14My husband or wife 14
On your own, or with someone
Involves someone else 12On my own 2
Theme · Affection and touch
Staying regulated in conflict 46Choosing your response 25Answering bids 22Medication and how it works 18The fear underneath anger 18Bringing the future closer 17The moment before you snap 17Your nervous system 15Fondness and admiration 15Equanimity and perspective 14Knowing your partner 14Affection and touch 14Get started 13What anger actually is 13Repair after rupture 13Systems for daily life 13Your sense of time 12Cool the body first 12Growing empathy 12Treatment and medication 11Structure and routine 10Gratitude 9Grounding and settling 9Feelings and focus 8Listening and understanding 8When everything feels flat 8Moving your body 7Getting assessed and diagnosed 7Exercise, food and other supports 6Making it stick 6Remembering to do it 6Rituals of connection 6Shared spiritual life 6Touch and bodywork 6Emotions as signals 5Being seen and judged 5What you are actually defending 5Rebuilding trust 5Screens and attention 5Practising under provocation 4Food, caffeine and fuel 4Treatment and medication 4Breathing 4Shame and stigma 4Tolerate distress 4Name what you feel 3Self-compassion 3When you use something to cope 3Question the thought 3The cost of avoiding 3What worry does 3What ADHD actually is 3Safety and grounding 3Facing it a step at a time 2Patience and trust 2Meaning after harm 2Ride the urge 2Shame 2Let the wave come 2Reading, numbers and learning differences 2When anger turns to harm 2Validate yourself and others 2Hold a boundary 2Working with anger 2Your worth is not conditional 2Calm the body 2Notice the pattern and flex 2Obsessions and compulsions 2Feeling from the inside 1Panic and the body 1Face it gently 1Your window of tolerance 1Keep the bond 1Anger, alcohol and the body 1Care for yourself in loss 1Act on your values 1Listen to the body 1Ask and say no well 1Breaking the worry loop 1Righteous anger and perfectionism 1Help someone grieving 1Get it out of your head 1
Approach
Emotionally focused 8Core 4Gottman 2
When
Any ordinary day 6Under stress 6Coming and going 1After a row 1

When your spouse is hurting today, be the place they come to, not one more thing to manage.

Move toward the pain, not away. A hand, a nearness, a steady I am here.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 9:40

When fear or hurt makes you want to hide today, reach for your spouse instead.

The instinct is to withdraw. Do the opposite: move toward, take a hand, let them in.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 9:40

When your spouse reaches today, respond with tenderness before anything else.

Not advice, not a fix. First a soft word or a warm hand, then the rest.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 3:159

After a hard moment today, hold each other before you move on.

Words can wait. A held embrace after conflict settles the body and the bond.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

Give your spouse one embrace today that lasts longer than usual, until you both soften.

A hug held past the polite second. Long enough for the shoulders to drop.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

When your spouse is overwhelmed today, sit close and let your calm steady them.

You do not have to fix it. A steady body beside a flooded one helps it settle.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 9:40

Offer your spouse warm touch today with nothing asked in return.

A hand on the shoulder, a passing squeeze. Contact that is only kindness, not a request.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

Let your presence be the place your spouse can fall apart safely today.

No performance required with you. Make your nearness the one place they can just be.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

Make one greeting or parting linger a few seconds longer than usual today.

A held hug at the door, a real kiss, not the quick automatic one. Let it last.

A minuteAffection and touchGottmanQur’an 30:21

Touch them once today with nothing else attached.

A hand on the shoulder as you pass. Sitting close on the sofa. Reaching for their hand while you talk about nothing. No agenda, no next step. Just…

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 30:21

Hold their hand while you talk about something completely ordinary.

Touch with no request attached is a language of safety all its own.

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 30:21

When they are upset, move physically closer before you say anything.

Nearness often comforts before any words can, and asks nothing in return.

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 30:21

Make them laugh once today, on purpose.

Shared lightness is not frivolous; it is a thread that keeps two people close.

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 2:187

Kiss, hold, and touch each other daily, at partings, reunions, and before bed. Learn the touch your partner likes.

Affection is not only for special moments. Small, regular touch keeps warmth and closeness alive.

A minuteAffection and touchGottmanQur’an 30:21

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.