AreasFocus, starting, and ADHD

Focus, starting, and ADHD

Most advice about focus is written for a brain that starts easily. This area is not. It covers what ADHD actually is, how to make a start when starting is the hard part, how to bring a future consequence close enough to feel, and how to stop paying for it in shame.

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167 practices
Theme
How long you have · A minute
Approach
When · Any ordinary day

The amount in a capsule can vary from bottle to bottle, and sometimes between capsules in the same bottle. Undeclared fillers have been found in them too.

This matters most when you are trying to work out whether something helps you. A good month followed by a flat one may be two different products…

A minuteExercise, food and other supportsMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:12

Kava can damage the liver at a high enough dose, badly enough that some countries have banned it. Herbal is not a synonym for gentle.

The unnerving part is how quiet liver damage is. Someone self medicating anxiety with kava can be accumulating harm and feel nothing at all until it…

A minuteExercise, food and other supportsMedical and treatmentQur’an 20:81

Vitamin C cannot really be stockpiled, since the excess leaves in your urine. A, D, E and K are stored in fat, so a large daily dose keeps adding to itself.

Vitamin D is where this bites at the moment, after a lot of people started taking big amounts on their own during the pandemic years. If you are…

A minuteExercise, food and other supportsMedical and treatmentQur’an 7:31

Omega supplements thin the blood, so they usually do not belong alongside warfarin. Bruising easily is often the first thing anyone notices.

One clinician worked out that her husband's bruising came from taking omegas on top of his Coumadin, and it settled once his doctor told him to stop.…

A minuteExercise, food and other supportsMedical and treatmentQur’an 73:20

If fish oil gives you those horrible repeats all afternoon, that is a fixable problem rather than a reason to stop. Keep the capsules in the freezer, ask about an enteric coated version, or try a flavoured liquid.

Sticking with something usually fails for small unglamorous reasons like this. Someone with a sensitive palate will not last four weeks with an…

A minuteExercise, food and other supportsMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

Most of what we call memory looks backwards. The kind that actually runs your week is the other sort: a plan that has to show up in your head at the one moment you could still act on it.

So when something gets missed, the question is not really whether you knew about it. You almost certainly did, at the time you agreed to it. What…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 59:18

A thought you have in the car about something to say at home is worth nothing until the person is actually there in front of you. Cues have to sit where the action becomes possible, not where you happened to think of it.

Picture where you will be at the moment the thing can be done, and put the reminder there: a note on the front door for something that happens on the…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 62:9

The moment you think of it is the only moment you are certain to have it. Do the thing, or write it down, or set the alarm, or put something odd in your pocket that will make no sense later until you check.

The two seconds of holding it in mind while you finish what you are doing is usually where it disappears. So make capture the reflex instead of the…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 9:105

Start the email and then stop: address it, write the subject line, leave it unsent. The half finished thing sits in your drafts looking wrong until you deal with it.

It works because it leaves an odd looking object in a place you already go, and because unfinished jobs nag in a way that quiet decisions do not.…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 87:9

The bag that has to travel with you tomorrow goes on top of your shoes, not neatly beside the desk. Let the object stand in the way of a route you walk without thinking.

The phrase worth keeping is point of performance: the reminder has to sit where the action happens, at the time it has to happen. A note on the…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 62:9

Sometimes you cannot write it down. You are driving, your hands are full, you are halfway through a conversation. Then picture the moment in detail instead: the room you will be standing in, the object you will be looking at when you do it.

Make the picture concrete rather than worthy. Not a solemn 'I must ring the surgery' but the desk you will be sitting at, the mug beside the phone,…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 59:18

The studies tying childhood screen hours to later attention problems are correlational. They cannot tell you which way the arrow points, and there is a very ordinary reading where it points the other way.

The child who cannot settle is the child most likely to be put in front of a screen so that dinner gets cooked. A parent who is scattered themselves…

A minuteScreens and attentionMedical and treatmentQur’an 3:14

A ping about a parcel and a ping about your mother's health feel identical in the second before you look. Give that feeling a name, false urgency, and you get a little room.

The buzz carries no information about importance. It borrows the feeling of importance and lends it to whatever happened to arrive. Naming it in the…

A minuteScreens and attentionADHD skillsQur’an 62:11

You are comparing how it feels inside your own head with what other people chose to show. Those two were never the same kind of thing.

Keep the sentence short enough to actually use, because you need it while your thumb is still moving, not an hour afterwards. Somebody's holiday…

A minuteScreens and attentionCoreQur’an 20:131

One gentle way to name it: those are being used as words to play with, and they were never really words for playing with. Said kindly, it lands without anyone being told off.

The young person in front of you almost certainly says it too, so any version that sounds like a reprimand will close the conversation down. Naming…

A minuteScreens and attentionCoreQur’an 25:72

When you wave off what your child is into, they rarely hear a comment about gaming. They hear something about themselves.

At that age a good part of who someone is gets built out of what they love, so a shrug at the thing usually lands as a shrug at the person. You do…

A minuteScreens and attentionCBTQur’an 3:14

Gaming for an hour before you start the work almost never costs an hour. Do the thing that has to be done first, then the thing you want.

Once something enjoyable is running, whatever you were meant to do afterwards looks duller than it already did, and the hour quietly becomes three.…

A minuteScreens and attentionADHD skillsQur’an 62:9

Charge the phone in another room overnight and use a proper alarm clock. Small change, and it takes the decision away from you completely.

In bed the phone is right there, and stopping is left to you at the hour you have the least left. Out of the room, there is nothing to resist. Buy…

A minuteScreens and attentionADHD skillsQur’an 13:28

The aim was never to stop needing the aids. It is to find ways round the parts that do not work well, and then to keep using them.

People tend to treat the alarms, the lists, the whiteboard by the door as scaffolding they ought to take down eventually. That is usually why it all…

A minuteSelf-compassionADHD skillsQur’an 4:28

Everyone has something about themselves they wish were different, and something they cannot do reliably however much they mean to. Yours has a name and a good deal of research behind it, which is not the same as being uniquely broken.

Say this carefully, because there is a careless version that does real damage. Everyone is a bit ADHD is not what is meant, and it leaves a person…

A minuteSelf-compassionADHD skillsQur’an 20:115