Practices
Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.
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149 practicesArea · Focus, starting, and ADHD
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone · Both of us together
Theme
Managing the ADHD is not the goal. Being happy together is the goal, and the ADHD work is only worth doing to the extent that it gets you there.
Keeping that order straight changes the atmosphere of the whole effort. A partner who has spent years being a project stops being one. Requests stop…
Do not write off simply sitting with someone. When researchers looked into why dummy treatments helped, one of the things they kept finding was half an hour of a person's full attention.
Thirty minutes of someone listening properly to your difficulties is not filler around the real treatment. Across the talking therapies, who the…
Coaching for adult ADHD comes down mostly to one thing: a standing appointment with somebody who will ask how it went. That sounds thin until you have tried keeping a plan alive entirely on your own.
A coach is not a therapist and does not need to be. They hold the horizon you keep losing and the fortnight that has quietly gone by, and they make…
Paying someone to help sort the house will not mend the marriage. It will remove one of the things you fight about most weeks, and that counts for more than it sounds.
Nobody should pretend this reaches anything deep. The point is arithmetic. A couple has a certain number of rows in them, and if the living room is…
People who are sleeping properly, eating properly and moving a bit tend to want each other more. The unglamorous parts of life management run closer to the bedroom than either of you might expect.
It is worth saying out loud when desire has quietly gone from a marriage, because the usual explanations reach for something heavier: he has lost…
A relationship with no friction in it can leave an ADHD partner restless rather than content. A bit of heat is not the same as a bad marriage. What matters is what happens afterwards.
Plenty of couples decide that any argument means something is broken, and then start managing each other into blandness, which nobody enjoys. The…
With children, practise the hard social moment rather than explaining it. Act out asking to join a game, or losing one, a few times at home where nothing is at stake.
Keep it light and short, let them play both parts, and be the one who gets it wrong sometimes so it does not feel like a test. Pick the situation…
Relationships take a lot of the strain here, and the usual shape is one person quietly carrying all the planning while the other feels constantly told off. Both halves are worth naming out loud before resentment sets hard.
The practical work is splitting the load by what each of you is actually good at rather than down the middle, and putting the shared admin somewhere…
ADHD reaches into a marriage in ways couples rarely say out loud: attention drifting during a conversation that mattered, or a partner who has started to feel like an unpaid manager. It is a fair thing to talk about and to get help with.
The hurt usually comes from what each of you concludes rather than from the behaviour itself. One reads distraction as not being loved, the other…
There is more about focus, starting, and adhd than the practices: the focus, starting, and adhd area has the themes and the courses too.