Practices
Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.
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457 practicesHow long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone · On my own
Theme
Approach · ADHD skills
Next time you tell yourself you will remember it, ask what you would bet on that. A month's rent, for or against. The answer usually arrives before you have finished asking.
Turning a comfortable belief into a wager makes its odds obvious, and it does it without a row. Keep it light and a bit silly, because the point is…
When you finish the dull task, give yourself something you actually like. A reward you do not really want does no work at all.
Choose it before you start and make it specific: the good coffee rather than whatever is in the cupboard, half an hour of the thing you keep…
When you get something hard done, resist waving it off with "anyone could have done that". Let it count.
That reflex is common in people who have spent years falling short of what they meant to do, and it quietly cancels the good of finishing. Try the…
There is a sort of avoidance that looks like getting things done. Sorting the drawer, clearing the inbox, any mildly useful job that is not the one you are dreading.
It is harder to catch than obvious time wasting because it leaves you nothing to feel guilty about. At the end of the day the shelf is tidy, the…
Rather than asking whether what you are doing is worthwhile, ask what it is keeping you away from.
The first question is too easy to pass. Almost anything you are doing can be defended as useful, which is why it never catches you out. The second…
Shrink the first step until it takes two minutes, and do only that.
The wall is usually the size of the first step, not the whole task. Make the step tiny enough to fall over.
Do not wait to feel ready. Say Musa's prayer, ease my task, and take one step; the wish to go on comes after.
Motivation usually follows action, not the other way round. Start badly if you must, but start.
When you catch yourself saying you are not motivated, try swapping the word out. Ask instead which bit has stalled: getting started, knowing what comes first, staying with it, or holding your attention on it at all.
Motivation is not one switch. It sits on top of several separate skills, and usually only one of them has failed on a given day. Naming that one…
Putting something off is often fear wearing a lazy costume. If planners have never fixed it for you, that is a clue the trouble is what the task makes you feel, not what your diary looks like.
Ask what you expect to happen when you open it. There is usually something specific in there: that it will be wrong, that it will swallow the whole…
Not all delaying is the same thing. Some of it is wanting it perfect, some of it is expecting to fail the way you did last time, and some of it is being genuinely busy with everything except the one job.
They need different answers. If it is standards, agree on a worse version and hand that in. If it is old failure, pick something small enough to…
The hardest kind of delaying to catch is the useful kind. You clear the inbox, sort the cupboard, answer three messages, and all of it is real work, and none of it is the thing.
It feels virtuous, which is why it survives so long. A quick test at the end of the day: is the thing I least wanted to do any closer than it was…
Instead of imagining consequences in general, remember one actual night you left it too late, and one actual time you started early. Your own memory carries a weight that a general warning never will.
Pick specific ones. The evening the printer failed at eleven, and the morning you had already finished and went out for a walk instead. Bring back…
Try giving the two of you names. Monday you keeps leaving messes for Thursday you, and Thursday you is getting fed up about it. Say it out loud and let it be a bit ridiculous.
The silliness is the point. Your future self can feel like a stranger you owe nothing to, and turning that person into a character with a grievance…
Nobody needs help starting the things they enjoy. The skill worth building is starting the dull ones, and it is a narrower skill than it looks.
This is why being able to play a game for four hours tells you nothing about whether starting is hard for you. Treat the boring task as its own…
Getting yourself going today usually means borrowing a feeling from later in the week. You are not summoning willpower so much as bringing Thursday's relief, or Thursday's panic, forward into Monday.
If that transfer is hard for you, the answer is not to try harder but to make the future more present: the date written where you will see it, a…
Two kinds of pressure get things done: the kind that comes from outside you, like deadlines and someone waiting, and the kind you generate yourself. Both are legitimate.
It is worth knowing which one you are running on in which part of your life, because trouble usually turns up where the outside pressure vanished and…
Working towards something you want will carry you further than working away from something you dread. Before you start, name in your own words what the finished thing gets you.
Fear only switches on when the threat is close, which is exactly how you end up doing a week's work at midnight. It also floods the job with anxiety…
At some point is not a deadline, and your brain treats it accordingly. If you want to move on something, give it a day, an hour, and a specific thing that happens if it slips.
Vague costs sit too far away to register at all. Sharpen them: not I should sort the insurance, but if this is not done by Friday the cover lapses on…
If nothing starts until the deadline is close enough to hurt, the missing piece is starting, not caring. The deadline is doing a job your own switch has not learned to do yet.
It is worth telling this apart from the delaying that comes out of fear or out of wanting it perfect, because they want different help. If the task…
Before deciding you are avoiding something, check that you actually know what it wants. How long, in what form, by when, and what counts as finished.
A surprising amount of stuckness is not avoidance at all. You cannot start a job whose shape you cannot see, so your mind slides off it and you call…
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