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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

264 practices
Twenty minutes remove filterOn my own remove filterClear all
Area
Focus, starting, and ADHD 119Your body 57Anger 45Low mood and hard feelings 24Worry and anxiety 13After harm 2Grief and loss 2Your marriage 2
How long you have · Twenty minutes
A minute 610Five minutes 981Twenty minutes 264Longer 119
Who it is written for
A practitioner 254Me 253Someone I care about 172My husband or wife 11
Where you are right now
Coping, mostly 134Struggling right now 80Getting ready for something 50
On your own, or with someone · On my own
On my own 264Involves someone else 126Both of us together 76
Theme
Systems for daily life 23Moving your body 17Medication and how it works 13Your nervous system 12Get started 12Food, caffeine and fuel 10What ADHD actually is 10Treatment and medication 9What anger actually is 8Bringing the future closer 7Screens and attention 7Your sense of time 7Touch and bodywork 6Tolerate distress 6The moment before you snap 6Cool the body first 6Feelings and focus 6Reading, numbers and learning differences 5The fear underneath anger 5Grounding and settling 5When you use something to cope 4Exercise, food and other supports 4Shame 4Getting assessed and diagnosed 4Remembering to do it 4When everything feels flat 4Practising under provocation 3Emotions as signals 3Righteous anger and perfectionism 3Equanimity and perspective 3Shame and stigma 3Being seen and judged 3Use your strengths 3Breathing 3Choosing your response 3Anger, alcohol and the body 3Obsessions and compulsions 2Structure and routine 2Breaking the worry loop 2When anger turns to harm 2Making it stick 2Feeling from the inside 2Facing it a step at a time 2Letting it out safely 2Keep the bond 1Repair after rupture 1What worry does 1The cost of avoiding 1What you are actually defending 1Rest and pacing 1Safety and grounding 1Shared spiritual life 1Posture and how you carry yourself 1Treatment and medication 1Question the thought 1Listen to the body 1Care for yourself in loss 1Living with uncertainty 1
Approach
ADHD skills 82Medical and treatment 57Body based 36Core 31CBT 22Mindfulness 10Trauma informed 7DBT skills 5Grief 4Emotionally focused 4Gottman 3Narrative 2Parts work 1
When
Any ordinary day 201Under stress 31In a change 14Coming and going 9After a row 7When apart 1Something good 1

Before you reach for a technique, notice what you privately think anger is. A room can hear disapproval underneath even a well chosen intervention.

It is worth spending real time on your own account of the thing: where it comes from, what it is trying to do, what it costs. If you hold it as bad…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 48:26

Skills rehearsed in total calm tend to vanish at the moment you need them. Practise on something still slightly warm, a real incident from this week, close enough that you feel a little of it.

Bring the scene back in enough detail that your chest tightens a bit, then do the work right there. What you read into it, what else it might have…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 42:37

If you grew up where the threat was real, your reading of a raised voice is not a distortion. It is accurate to somewhere you used to be.

So the work is not correcting a mistake. It is learning to tell one setting from another, which is slower and needs practising in daylight rather…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 42:39

Some anger arrives with an argument already inside it: that they disrespected you, that this is not how you are meant to be treated. It burns cooler than the sudden kind and it lasts much longer.

Because it is made of a story, it can be handled at the level of the story. What did that gesture actually mean. What would it mean if they were…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 5:8

For most people anger is weather that passes. For some it is closer to climate: quicker to arrive, bigger when it lands, slower to leave.

Knowing which you are changes what you plan for. Weather can be waited out. Climate needs arrangements: sleep kept regular, fewer things stacked on…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 7:154

Live under enough strain for long enough and anger stops being an event. It settles into a new normal, and it can feel as though your character has changed.

Ask what has been running in the background: money, pain, night shifts, a job that grinds, somebody ill at home. When those ease the baseline often…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 7:43

Sometimes the row is not really about the row. Some people reach for conflict because it is the one thing that makes them feel properly awake.

If you notice you feel sharp and alive during an argument and flat afterwards, that is worth sitting with rather than being ashamed of. The need…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 70:19

Before treating a temper as a character problem, check the body. Poor sleep, hunger, a new medication, drinking, a head injury and a number of neurological conditions all show up as a short fuse.

This matters most when the change is recent. Somebody even tempered for forty years who is now flying off at nothing has usually got something…

Twenty minutesWhat anger actually isCoreQur’an 21:37

The mind that runs ahead into everything that could go wrong is the same mind that plans well, sees round corners and has things ready in time. One trait, pointed in two directions.

If you have been told all your life that you overthink, it is worth saying plainly that this trait has served you. The aim is not to flatten it. It…

Twenty minutesWhat worry doesCBTQur’an 6:59

A small child works out how to feel about itself by looking at its parents' faces. If that face was missing, or busy, the looking does not stop, it just moves on to teachers, coaches, friends and strangers.

It is part of why being disrespected can feel so much larger than the moment deserves. Some of that old search is still running. The work is slow and…

Twenty minutesWhat you are actually defendingCoreQur’an 50:16

Ask one question about the worry: is there something to be done here that has not been done? If yes, make the plan. If the plan already exists, or there is nothing to plan, the worry gets no more of your time.

Making a study timetable is useful once. Making it for the fourth time is worry wearing the clothes of work. The test is not how serious the topic is…

Twenty minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 3:159

Online you can edit, delete, mute and leave. People who have done most of their socialising that way often find ordinary company unbearable, because ordinary company cannot be controlled.

If that describes you, the answer is not to become a different sort of person. It is practice in rooms you cannot manage: a class, a job with shifts,…

Twenty minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 29:45

A regular sitting practice is training rather than a treat. What you practise when things are calm is what your body can find when they are not.

The state people describe in mindfulness and the state of feeling safe in your own body overlap almost completely. That is a good reason to keep the…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 33:41

Yoga, slow breathing with feedback, neurofeedback and listening programmes are all aiming at the same target. Pick the one you can actually get to and keep doing.

Because they share a mechanism, they are largely swappable. Cost, travel, waiting lists and whether you enjoy it are legitimate grounds for choosing…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 2:152

If you mostly run hot and jumpy, start with slow paced breathing. If you mostly go blank and far away, work that reaches you through sound and voice tends to get further.

The idea is to pick the tool that pulls against your usual tilt. Breathing practice puts the brake back on a system that has lost it. Sound and voice…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 23:78

If you understand your history perfectly and nothing has changed, you are not failing at this. Insight alone is pushing water uphill against the current of information coming from your body.

Articulate people get stuck here often, because talking is the thing they are best at. What tends to be missing is an actual experience of being safe…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 13:28

None of this makes thinking useless. Making sense of what happened, and changing what you concluded about yourself, does work that no breathing exercise touches.

The body work settles the alarm. The thinking work deals with the verdict you passed on yourself afterwards: that you are weak, that it was your…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 3:191

Being still is not the problem. The circuit that shuts you down under threat is the same one that lets you sleep deeply, digest, rest and curl up with someone you love.

So the aim is not to stay switched on. It is to be still and safe at the same time, which is a capacity you can rebuild rather than a symptom to…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 25:47

Deep rest needs a dose like anything else. If a long daily relaxation is leaving you flatter each week rather than steadier, make it shorter.

Someone can start a forty day programme of long guided rest with the best intentions and find that by the second week they are sinking instead of…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 25:47

If you are the person who steadies every room, ask yourself when a room last steadied you.

Some people are very good at this because they were handed the job at six years old, in a house where somebody had to keep everyone level. It becomes…

Twenty minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 28:73

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.