Practices
Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.
Narrowed down
215 practicesArea · Focus, starting, and ADHD
How long you have
Who it is written for · Me
Where you are right now · Struggling right now
On your own, or with someone
Theme
By the time the motivation turns up, the moment to act has usually gone. Thursday night panic about a report due on Friday is real motivation, just delivered too late to be any use.
Worth saying to yourself without contempt, because the pattern is not a preference for pressure. The job is to move the feeling earlier rather than…
That Thursday night feeling, fully motivated at last with no good option remaining, is a trap in the timing rather than a fault in you.
It is worth naming, because most people have been told the opposite about themselves for years. The scramble is what happens when the deadline is the…
When the panic finally shows up, take it as news about the past rather than a call to action. It means the good options went a while ago.
You can use the sentence on yourself in the moment: by the time I feel it, it is already too late. Not as a beating, just as information. Two things…
Someone who will tell you the part that was not good is someone whose 'that was fine' you can believe. That is what settles the doubt, not reassurance.
Blanket praise carries no information, so it slides off and the doubt is back within the hour. If you tend to worry about how you came across, ask…
Thursday night goes badly, you swear at yourself, and you mean every word. Next quarter the same thing happens. That is not you failing to learn. It is a lesson that cannot survive the distance.
For the memory of a bad night to change anything in August, it would have to still be vivid in August, and it will not be. So stop waiting for the…
Someone running just ahead of the avalanche has nowhere to stand and think. Reflection needs a bit of room, and a life with no room in it cannot make any.
This is why so much sensible advice slides straight off. Before asking what the wisest option is, something usually has to come off the pile: fewer…
Nobody decides well mid-panic. So cutting the number of panics is itself a way of making better decisions, even if nothing about your judgement changes at all.
It is slow work and it is usually the real work: fewer things said yes to, earlier starts, deadlines negotiated before they are sitting on top of…
Choose one person and tell them you will send the finished thing by a set time. Not a conversation about how it is going, just the file, the photo, or the word done.
The sending is the whole mechanism, so keep it small and exact: what, and by when. It does not have to be someone qualified to judge the work, and it…
With attention difficulties the organising side often runs a few years behind the birthday. A nineteen year old may be running life more like a sixteen year old, and that is a lag rather than a verdict.
Set expectations against where someone actually is instead of what year they were born in. That way the support that felt normal at school does not…
If you cannot start, the step is too big. Shrink it until it sounds daft: open the document, write the date, put one plate in the sink.
The catch is that the daft step has to be the whole of what you agreed to do, not a trick for getting yourself to do the enormous thing. Most days…
Put something you genuinely want at the end of the chain, and keep it where you can see it. A reward far off in the future is much the same as no reward at all.
Name it before you begin and write it at the top of the page. Keep it close: this evening rather than next term. It does not have to be impressive.…
Putting something in the diary does not guarantee it happens. It gives it a chance it did not have before. That is the honest promise, and it is still worth having.
Expect a fair few blocks to pass unused, particularly in the first month. That is not the system failing, it is the system doing what it does, which…
Every time your eye lands on the job you have never started, it takes a small toll. Ten of those on one list is a tax you pay all day without noticing.
This is the argument for cutting a list back hard, and it has nothing to do with tidiness. An item you are not going to do still costs you something…
If everything came apart the moment school ended, it may be that the structure was never yours. It belonged to the timetable, and the timetable stopped.
School decides when you get up, what happens next and when the work is due, so nobody ever finds out whether the person can build a week from…
A young person hears the fear in a house even when nobody says anything. If the adults are frightened about their future, they usually take that fear as a verdict on themselves.
If you are the worried parent, you do not have to perform calm. It works better to say the true version out loud: I am anxious about this, the…
If a course has no fixed time, give it one. Write down which day and which hour you will watch it, put that in the calendar as though somebody else set it, and tell one person.
Five minutes every Sunday: when am I watching this, and when am I doing the work that comes after it. Then one short message midweek to whoever is…
Writing the list is the easy half. If twelve things are down on paper and you still cannot move, the missing skill is choosing, not capturing.
Decide with a question rather than by feel: what actually happens if this is not done by Friday. Anything with a real consequence goes to the top,…
There is a corner of the week that is neither urgent nor important, and it is where avoiding lives. The real cost is rarely the lost hours. It is what you end up saying to yourself afterwards.
Learn the difference between resting and avoiding, because from outside they look identical and they feel nothing alike. Rest leaves you lighter.…
Some things can only be done between nine and five, and those are the ones that quietly fail. Ring the bank, chase the appointment, sort the form: give those a time before anything else.
The failure is silent. You mean to do it all day, the office closes, and it rolls to tomorrow where the same thing happens again. Go through your…
Before you try to prioritise better, check whether there is any order in there at all. Plenty of people who feel stuck cannot say which of their jobs is genuinely required and which is merely wanted.
You can test it in a couple of minutes. Write the things down and mark the ones that carry a real consequence if they do not happen this week. If you…
There is more about focus, starting, and adhd than the practices: the focus, starting, and adhd area has the themes and the courses too.